UNIVERSAL PRESENTS 

CARY GRANT AUDREY HEPBURN 

in CHARADE 

A STANLEY DONEN PRODUCTION 							

Co-starring WALTER MATTHAU  With  JAMES COBURN 				
			

GEORGE KENNEDY  DOMINIQUE MINOT  JACQUES MARIN  THOMAS CHELIMSKY 	
	NED GLASS  PAUL BONIFAS 					

Director of Photography CHARLES LANG Jr, A.S.C. 			
				

Assistant Director Art Director Assistant Art Director Camera 
Operator 2nd Unit Cameraman			MARC MAURETTE JEAN 
D'EAUBONNE AUGUSTE CAPELIER HENRI TIQUET HENRI PERSIN			
	

Song 'CHARADE' Lyric: JOHNNY MERCER Music: HENRY MANCINI		
					

Sound Mixers JACQUES CARRERE BOB JONES Make-Up ALBERTO de ROSSI 
JOHN O'GORMAN Dubbing Editor ALLAN MORRISON				
			

Production Manager Production Executive Editor	LEOPOLD 
SCHLOSBERG ARTHUR CARROLL JAMES CLERK					
	

MISS HEPBURN'S CLOTHES BY Title Designed by Animation			
	GIVENCHY MAURICE BINDER  ROBERT ELLIS TECHNICOLOR®		
	

Music HENRY MANCINI							

Associate Producer JAMES WARE							

Screenplay by  PETER STONE  Story by  PETER STONE  and  MARC BEHM	
						

Produced and Directed by STANLEY DONEN					
		







CHARADE TRANSCRIBED BY Graham (hepburn@unforgettable.com)



Somewhere in the country, France. A train approaches, closer and 
closer. As it roars past, a person is thrown from it. The body 
tumbles down the bank, and lands face up. The face is covered in 
blood; the eyes staring into the sky, dead. Begin Credit 
Sequence. 



A resort in the French Alps. Regina Lampert is sat, eating, at a 
table. A gloved hand holding a gun appears and fires a jet of 
water into Regina's face, about to drink from her cup. She looks 
up to see a little boy standing before her, smiling. 



JEAN-LOUIS. Oo la! 

REGINA. Don't tell me, you didn't know it was loaded? [Shouting] 
Sylvie! [Sylie comes over to her table and sees the mess]. 

SYLVIE. Oh. 

REGINA. Can't he do something constructive like start an 
avalanche or something? 

SYLVIE [says something to Jean-Louis in French. He runs off; 
Sylvie sits down]. When you start to act like this something is 
the matter. 

REGINA. Sylvie, I'm getting a divorce. 

SYLVIE. What? From Charles? 

REGINA. He's the only husband I have. I've tried to make it work, 
really I have, but—. 

SYLVIE. But what? 

REGINA. Oh, I can't explain it. It's just that I'm too miserable 
to go on any longer like this. [She gets up and they walk across 
the building to the viewing platform]. 

SYLVIE. It is infuriating that your unhappiness does not turn 
into fat! But I don't understand: why do you want a divorce? 	

REGINA. Because I don't love him—and he obviously doesn't love 
me. 

SYLVIE. But that's no reason to get a divorce. With a rich 
husband and this year's clothes, you won't find it difficult to 
make some new friends. 

REGINA. Look, I admit I came to Paris to escape American 
provincial but that doesn't mean I'm ready for French 
traditional. I loathe the whole idea of divorce, Sylvie; but if 
only Charles had been honest with me—[Sylvie sits down] that's 
all I ask of anybody: the simple truth. [She sits down at the 
table]. But with Charles everything is secrecy and lies. He's 
hiding something from me, Sylvie—something terrible, and it 
frightens me. 

PETER. Does he belong to you? 

REGINA [She looks up at a man standing with Jean-Louis] Umm, it's 
hers. Where did you find him, robbing a bank? 

PETER. He was throwing snowballs at Baron Rothschild. 

SYLVIE [taking Jean-Louis] Oh, thank you. 

PETER. Do we know each other? 

REGINA. Why, do you think we're going to? 

PETER. I don't know; how would I know? 

REGINA. Because I already know an awful lot of people and until 
one of them dies I couldn't possibly meet anyone else. 

PETER. Hmmm. Well, if anyone goes on the critical list, let me 
know. [Turns, about to leave] 

REGINA. Mmmm, quitter. 

PETER [coming back] Uh-huh. 

REGINA [laughing] You give up awfully easy, don't you? 

SYLVIE [getting up; Jean-Louis follows her] Vien, Jean-Louis, let 
us make a walk; I've never seen a Rothschild before. [Jean-Louis 
turns back and squirts Peter full in the face with his water 
pistol]. 

PETER. Clever fellow; almost missed me. [She gives him a 
handkerchief] Thank you. [He starts drying his face off]. 

REGINA. You're blocking my view. 

PETER. Oh, er, oh, well, which view would you prefer? 

REGINA. The one you're blocking. See it's my last chance: I'm 
flying back to Paris this afternoon. What's your name? 

PETER. Peter Joshua. 

REGINA. Oh, mine's Regina Lampert. 

PETER. Is there a Mr. Lampert? 

REGINA. Yes. 

PETER. Good for you. 

REGINA. No, it isn't, I'm getting a divorce. 

PETER. Please, not on my account. 

REGINA. Oh, no, you see I don't really love him. 

PETER. Well, at least you're honest. 

REGINA. Is there a Mrs. Joshua? 

PETER. Yes, but we're divorced. 

REGINA. Oh, that was no proposal; I'm just curious. 

PETER. Is your husband with you? 

REGINA. Oh no, Charles is never with me. What do people call you: 
Pete? 

PETER. Mister Joshua. 

REGINA. Oh. 

PETER. I've enjoyed talking with you. [Starts to leave]. 

REGINA [stopping him] Mmm, now you're angry. 

PETER. No, no, I'm not angry—I just have a lot of packing to do; 
I'm going back to Paris too. 

REGINA. Well, wasn't is Shakespeare who said "when strangers do 
meet in far off lands they should ne'er long see each other 
again"? 

PETER. Shakespeare never said that! 

REGINA. How do you know? 

PETER. It's terrible; you just made it up. 

REGINA. Oh well, it sounds right. You gonna call me? 

PETER. Are you in the book? 

REGINA. Well, Charles is. 

PETER. Is there only one Charles Lampert? 

REGINA. Mmmm. Lord, I hope so. [Breathes in sharply, holding her 
hand to her face]. 



 Paris, a residential area. A car laden with luggage on the roof 
pulls up. Regina gets out as the driver goes to unload the 
luggage. 

	

REGINA. Goodbye, Sylvie—and thanks. 

JEAN-LOUIS [leaning out the window] When you get your divorce, 
are you going back to America? 

REGINA. Well, don't you want me to stay? 

JEAN-LOUIS. Yes, of course, but if you went back and wrote me a 
letter—. 	

REGINA. You could have the stamps. I'll get you some here, ok? 

JEAN-LOUIS. Ok. 

REGINA Goodbye.  She walks to the building, followed by the 
driver carrying her luggage.  Regina arrives at the front door, 
upstairs, and the driver puts down her luggage. She pays him and 
he leaves. Regina unlocks the door and opens it, revealing her 
apartment: vacant and devoid of all furnishings. She stands in 
the doorway bewildered, then enters calling out. 

REGINA. Honorine? Honorine?!  She opens the double-doors to the 
adjacent room, then walks in, looking over the empty shelves. She 
rushes back across the main room to open the other set of doors. 
Running in, she frantically opens the cupboard and wardrobe doors 
in turn, but they are all empty. She runs back towards the front 
door and runs into a French gentleman, letting out a shriek. 

GRANDPIERRE. Madame * Lampert? 

REGINA. Yes? 

GRANDPIERRE. I'm Inspector Edward Grandpierre, [holding up his 
card] of the Police Judiciere. Would you be so kind as to come 
with me, please? [He points to the door and she obeys, followed 
by the Inspector]. 



A morgue drawer is opened, revealing a covered body. The 
Inspector looks at the tag, tied to the man's big toe: it says 
"LAMPERT Charles". 

GRANDPIERRE [pulling away the cloth covering the man's face] 
Well, Madame? [She nods] You are positive? [Observing her 
unemotional reaction] You loved him? 

REGINA [impassively, looking down] I'm very cold.  The morgue 
attendant slowly slides the drawer shut. 



 The Inspector's Office. Regina and the Inspector are sat facing 
each other at his desk. The Inspector opens his drawer, revealing 
some particulars of Regina's husband. 



GRANDPIERRE. We discovered your husband's body lying next to the 
tracks of the Paris-Bourdeau railroad line. [He shuts the drawer 
then leans on the desk, clasping his hands] He was dressed only 
in his pyjamas. Do you know of any reason why he might have 
wanted to leave France? 

REGINA [bewildered] Leave? No. 

GRANDPIERRE. Your husband possessed a ticket of passage on the 
Maranguater. It sailed for Renage Villa this morning at seven. 

REGINA. I'm very confused [she stands up, opening her handbag]. 

GRANDPIERRE. He was American, your husband? 

REGINA. Swiss. 

GRANDPIERRE. Ah, Swiss. His profession? 

REGINA. He didn't have one. 

GRANDPIERRE [to Regina, pacing in front of his desk, eating 
lollies] He was a wealthy man? 

REGINA. I suppose so; I don't know. 

GRANDPIERRE. About how wealthy would you say? 

REGINA. I don't know. 

GRANDPIERRE. Where did he keep his money? 

REGINA. I don't know. 

GRANDPIERRE. Besides yourself, who is his nearest relative? 

REGINA. I don't know. 

GRANDPIERRE [standing up] That's absurd madame! [He says some 
French]. 

REGINA. I know. I'm sorry. 

GRANDPIERRE. It is alright. 

REGINA [to the Inspector, about to light a cigar] I wish you 
wouldn't. 

GRANDPIERRE [he picks up the phone and speaks a few French words 
to it. He walks over to Regina] On Wednesday last, your husband 
sold the entire contents of the apartment at public auction. 
Everything. The gallery paid him one million two hundred and 
fifty thousand new francs; in dollars, a quarter of a million. 
The authorities in Bordeau searched his compartment on the train. 
They searched it thoroughly. They did not find two hundred and 
fifty thousand dollars! [A man comes in, carrying a basket 
containing a bag, which Grandpierre takes. The man leaves and 
Grandpierre takes the bag over to his desk] These few things are 
all that was found in the train compartment; there was no other 
baggage. Your husband must have been in a great hurry. [Taking 
the items out in turn] One wallet containing four thousand 
francs. One agenda. [Opening the diary] His last notation was 
made yesterday, Thursday: five p.m. Jardin des Champs-Élysées. 
Why there? 

REGINA. I don't know. Perhaps he met somebody. 

GRANDPIERRE [putting down the diary] Obviously. [Reaching into 
the bag again] One ticket of passage to South America. One 
letter, stamped but unsealed, addressed to you. 

REGINA. May I see it, please? [She takes and sits down, opening 
it] "My dear Regina, I hope you are enjoying your holiday. Mare 
Jeve* can be so lovely at this time of year. The days pass very 
slowly and I hope to see you soon. As always, Charles. P.S. Your 
dentist called yesterday. Your appointment has been changed." Not 
much, is it? 

GRANDPIERRE. We took the liberty of calling your dentist. We 
thought perhaps we would learn something. 

REGINA. Did you? 

GRANDPIERRE. Yes. Your appointment has been changed. [Taking his 
cigar but remembering, he puts it back in his drawer, slamming 
it. Taking items out of the bag again] One key to your apartment; 
one comb; one fountain pen; one toothbrush; one tin of tooth 
powder. That is all. If you will sign this list you may take the 
things with you. [He hands it to her]. 

REGINA [signing the paper] Is that all? May I leave now? 

GRANDPIERRE. One more question. Is this your husband's passport? 
[he holds it up to her]. 

REGINA. Yes. 

GRANDPIERRE. And this? [holding up a different passport, with 
Regina's husband's photo inside] 

REGINA. I don't understand. 

GRANDPIERRE [showing her another] And this? [And yet another] And 
this. [Regina stares, mouth open, into which she puts another 
sweet.] 



Regina's apartment. She stands inside in the darkness of one of 
the rooms of her apartment when the door is opened, lighting the 
room. 

PETER. Oh, I telephoned but nobody answered. 

REGINA [she smiles, recognising the silhouetted figure] Hello. 

PETER. Hello. I wanted to tell you how sorry I am; and see if 
there's anything I can do. 

REGINA. How did you find out? 

PETER. It's in the afternoon papers. I'm very sorry. 

REGINA. Thank you. [She walks to the door]. 

PETER. Er, er, I pressed the bell but it doesn't ring you, I 
guess. 

REGINA. I know; there's no electricity. [They walk into the main 
room]. 

PETER. Well, where did everything go? 

REGINA. Charles sold it all at auction. This is all I have left 
[she sits on her unopened luggage]. I love this room but Charles 
never really saw it—only the things in it. I think I prefer it 
this way. 

PETER. What are you going to do? 

REGINA. Try and get my old job back at EURESCO, I suppose. 

PETER. Doing what? 

REGINA. I'm a simultaneous translator, like Sylvie, only she's 
English into French and I'm French into English. That's what I 
was doing before I married Charles. Police probably think I 
killed him. 

PETER. Instant divorce, you mean? 

REGINA. Something like that. It's terrible to end it this way 
though: tossed off a train like a sack of third-class mail. 

PETER. Well, come on, you can't stay here. 

REGINA. I don't know where to go. 

PETER. We'll find you a hotel. 

REGINA [standing, with a smile] Nothing too expensive. I'm not a 
lady of leisure anymore, you know. 

PETER. Something clean and modest; and near enough to EURESCO so 
that you can take a cab when it rains. Ok? 



 A record player comes on, playing violin music through a loud 
speaker. The building is a church. Regina and Sylvie are sat at 
the front row, Regina's husband laid out in front in an open 
casket. Inspector Grandpierre is sat at the back. 



REGINA [talking to Sylvie in loud whispers] Not a very large 
turnout, is it? 

SYLVIE. Didn't Charles have any friends? 

REGINA. Don't ask me: I'm only the widow. If Charles had died in 
bed we wouldn't even have him. [Grandpierre, aroused, looks up]. 

SYLVIE [looking back at Grandpierre, with his head down] At least 
he knows how to behave at funerals. [We see the Inspector close 
up, looking down, clipping his fingernails]. Have you no idea who 
could have done it? 

REGINA. Until two days ago the only thing I really knew about 
Charles was his name. Now it seems I didn't even know that.  A 
man opens the church door and takes off his hat. He is a short, 
balding man (Leopold Gideon). He holds his hat to his chest as he 
walks down the aisle to the coffin. He looks at the dead man's 
face intently, then bursts into a spontaneous sneezing fit. 

SYLVIE. He must have known Charles pretty well. 

REGINA. How can you tell? 

SYLVIE. He's allergic to him. [The man swallows a pill then turns 
and walks back from the coffin]. 

REGINA [to the man as he passes] Bless you. 

SYLVIE. Do you know him? 

REGINA. Never seen him before.  The man, still looking back 
surprised at Regina, walks into Grandpierre. He then sits down a 
few rows from the back.  The church door creaks open loudly. A 
second man enters, tall and slim (Tex Panthollow). Everyone 
watches as he walks to the coffin, takes out a mirror and holds 
it up to the corpse's nose for a few seconds. Looking at the 
mirror satisfied, the man puts it back in his pocket. 

TEX [placing a flower taken from his pocket on the dead man's 
chest] 'riva derchy*, Charlie. [He walks up to Regina] Miss 
Lampert, ma'am? Er, Miss Lampert, ma'am: Charlie had no call to 
doin' it that-a way. No siree. [He walks a few rows back, sitting 
down directly behind Regina and Sylvie].  The door is thrown open 
more violently by a third man, quite tall and heavily built, 
wearing a trench coat (Herman Scobie). They watch as he strides 
to the front, hands in pockets. He takes out a pin from his lapel 
and thrusts it into one of Charles Lampert's crossed hands. 
Regina and Sylvie flinch at this and Regina inhales sharply. 
Satisfied, the man takes the pin and tosses it in Charles's face, 
then strides quickly back and straight out of the door of the 
church, slamming the door behind him. 

REGINA [sighs] What next? [She inhales sharply, wide-eyed, as a 
hand is placed on her shoulder]. 

FRENCH MAN. Me pardon, madame. [He hands her a letter]. 

REGINA. Merci. 

FRENCH MAN [walking backwards, bent in respect] Pardon; pardon; 
pardon; pardon. 

SYLVIE. Who's it from? 

REGINA [looking at the opened letter, which is headed: "The 
Foreign Service of the United States of America. From the office 
of H. Bartholomew]. The American Embassy.  The typed letter says: 
"Dear Mrs. Lampert: Please drop by my office tomorrow at noon-
thirty. I am anxious to discuss the matter of your late husband's 
death. Sincerely, H. Bartholomew". 



 The American Embassy. Regina is standing in a lift, looking at 
the letter. The doors open and as she gets out, two men enter. 
She stands watching them engrossed in conversation. 



EMBASSY MAN1. I bluffed the old man out of the last pot with a 
pair of deuces. 

EMBASSY MAN2. What's so depressing about that? 

EMBASSY MAN1. Well, I mean if I can do it what are the Russians 
doing to him?  The lift door closes. Regina walks to the office, 
tapping on the door. 	

REGINA [opening the door, leaning in tentatively] Hello? [Louder] 
Hello? 

BARTHOLOMEW [speaking unseen from the next office] Is there 
anything wrong, Miss Tomkins? 

REGINA. Er, Miss Tomkins isn't here. 

BARTHOLOMEW [appearing through the door] Oh, I'm sorry. My 
secretary must have gone to lunch. Er, you are, er...? 

REGINA. Mrs. Lampert, Mrs. Charles Lampert. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Oh yes, please er, come in, Mrs. Lampert. [She walks 
in] Excuse me for a moment Mrs. Lampert. [He closes the door. 
Pointing to his tie] It's a stubborn little devil. [Taking some 
cleaning fluid from a bottle] Dry cleaning-wise, things are all 
fouled-up. [He rubs his tie with a cloth]. I had a good man, a 
really excellent man, on the Roue Pon* two, but H.Q. asked us to 
use the plant here in the building to ease the gold outflow. 

REGINA. Mr. Bartholomew: are you quite sure you know who I am? 

BARTHOLOMEW. You're Charles Lampert's widow, yes? I'm very sorry. 
Last time I sent out a tie only the spot came back. 'Voila', as 
they say. Would you sit down, Mrs. Lampert? [She sits. He walks 
to a cupboard] I've got something here [opening it, taking out a 
dish of food]: I've got liverwurst, liverwurst, chicken, and 
liverwurst. 

REGINA [looking up at him holding the sandwiches] No, thank you. 

BARTHOLOMEW [walking over to his desk, putting the sandwiches 
down] Mrs. Lampert: do you know what C.I.A. is? 

REGINA. I don't suppose it's an airline, is it? 

BARTHOLOMEW [opening the desk drawer] Central Intelligence 
Agency: C.I.A. 

REGINA. You mean spys, and all that? 

BARTHOLOMEW [taking a bottle from the drawer] Only we call them 
agents. 

REGINA. We? You mean you're—. 

BARTHOLOMEW [opening the bottle with a corkscrew] Someone has to 
do it, Mrs. Lampert. 

REGINA. It's just that I didn't think people like you were 
supposed to admit— 

BARTHOLOMEW. Oh, I'm not an agent. I'm an administrator—a desk 
jockey; trying to run a bureau of overworked men with 
underallocated [pops the cork] funds. Congress seems to think 
that all a spy needs—. 

REGINA. Agent. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Yes. —That all he needs is a codebook, a cyanide 
pill, and [pouring a glass] he's in business. 

REGINA. What's all this got to do with me, Mr. Bartholomew? 

BARTHOLOMEW. Your husband was wanted by the United States 
government. 

REGINA. May I have a sandwich, please? 

BARTHOLOMEW. Chicken or liverworst? 

REGINA [firmly] Chicken! 

BARTHOLOMEW. To be more specific, Mrs Lampert, your husband was 
wanted by this agency [offering her a sandwich] 

REGINA [taking a sandwich] So that was it?! [she starts eating 
it, listening intently to everything Bartholomew says]. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Yes. We of course knew him by his real name: Voss, 
Charles Voss. Alright, Mrs. Voss, well, I'd like you to look at 
this photograph, here, for a moment please. [Taking a photograph 
from the drawer] Tell us if you recogni— oh, by the way, have you 
seen this one? [Taking a picture from the desk, holding it up for 
her] Scott, Kathy, and Ham, Junior. 

REGINA. They're very sweet. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Aren't they? Alright, Mrs. Voss—. 

REGINA. Please stop calling me that; Lampert's the name on the 
marriage license. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Oh, I'm terribly sorry. Mrs. Lampert, er, will you 
look at that photograph and tell me if you recognise anyone, 
please? [She takes it] Uh, just a moment; have a good look [He 
gives her a magnifying glass]. 

REGINA [looking through the glass at the picture—an old one of 
men dressed in military uniform] It's Charles! 

BARTHOLOMEW. Very good. 

REGINA. He looks so young. When was this taken? 

BARTHOLOMEW. Nineteen forty-four. Next, please. 

REGINA [looking at the next man in the photo] The man who was at 
the funeral yesterday; the tall man in a corduroy suit. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Does the name Tex Panthollow mean anything to you? 

REGINA. No. 

BARTHOLOMEW [offering her a cup] Would you like some wine? 

REGINA. No, thank you. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Next, please. 

REGINA. He was there too—a little less hair but it's the same 
one. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Do you him, Mrs. Lampert: Leopold W. Gideon? 

REGINA. No. 

BARTHOLOMEW. The last one, please. 

REGINA. That's a face you don't forget. He was there too! 

BARTHOLOMEW. Herman Scobie. You never seen him before either? 

REGINA. No, thank heaven! 

BARTHOLOMEW. Mrs. Lampert: I'm very much afraid that you are in a 
great deal of danger. 

REGINA. Why should I be any danger? 

BARTHOLOMEW [sitting down at his desk] You're Charles Voss's 
wife. Now that he's dead you're their only lead. 

REGINA. Mr. Bartholomew: if you're trying to frighten me— you're 
doing a first-rate job! 

BARTHOLOMEW. Please do what we ask, Mrs. Lampert, it's your only 
chance. 

REGINA. Gladly, but I don't know what you want; you haven't told 
me. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Oh? I haven't? W— it's the money, Mrs. Lampert, the 
money: [chewing on a sandwich] the two hundred and fifty thousand 
dollars Charles Voss received from the auction. Those three men 
want it too—they want it very badly. 

REGINA. But that's Charles's money, not theirs. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Oh, Mrs. Lampert, I'd love to see you try and 
convince them of that. Oh boy... 

REGINA. Then whose is it: his or theirs? 

BARTHOLOMEW. Ours. 

REGINA. Oh... 

BARTHOLOMEW. Charles Voss stole two hundred and fifty thousand 
dollars from the United States government. I'm afraid we want it 
back. 

REGINA. But I don't have it. 

BARTHOLOMEW [walking over to her] That's impossible, Mrs Lampert. 
You're the only one who could have it. 

REGINA. Mr. Bartholomew: if I had a quarter of a million dollars, 
believe me, I'd know it! 

BARTHOLOMEW. Nevertheless, Mrs Lampert, you've got it. 

REGINA. You mean, it's just lying around somewhere—all that cash? 

BARTHOLOMEW. Or, er, certified cheque, a safe deposit key, 
baggage claim. You look for it, Mrs. Lampert, I'm quite sure 
you'll (REGINA. but—) find it. Look for it! Look just as hard and 
as fast as you can. You may not have a great deal of time. 
[Walking over to behind the desk] Those three men know you've got 
the money just as surely as we do; you won't be safe until the 
money's in our hands. Is that clear? [She nods silently. Writing 
a note for her] Now here's where you ought to call me, day or 
night. It's a direct line to both my office [he burps] and my 
apartment. [He hands her the note] And please don't tell anyone 
about coming to see us today, it could prove fatal for them as 
well as yourself. As I said, Mrs Lampert, I'm afraid you're in a 
great deal of danger. I regret very much having to say this but 
please remember what happened to your husband. [Regina looks him, 
gravely.] 



 A Punch and Judy show outside for a group of kids. Regina is 
watching unemotionally from the back, standing behind the 
laughing children. Peter approaches her. 



PETER. Hello. 

REGINA [she turns to him, smiling] Hello, Peter. 

PETER. Now, didn't you telelphone me to meet you on that corner, 
there? 

REGINA. I'm sorry, I heard the children laughing. Do you 
understand French? 

PETER. Not a word. I'm still having trouble with English. 

REGINA [they watch the performance] The man and the woman are 
married. 

PETER. Oh, I can see that: they're batting each other over the 
head. [Motioning to the action onstage, as Grandpierre approaches 
behind them, unnoticed] Who's that with the hat? 

REGINA. That's the Policeman. He wants to arrest Judy for killing 
Punch. 

PETER. What's she saying now? 

REGINA. That she's innocent. She didn't do it. 

PETER [slyly; watching the show but talking to Regina] Oh, she 
did it, alright. 

REGINA [firmly] I believe her. 

PETER [still watching the show] Well, who was that? 

REGINA. That's Punch, of course. 

PETER. Punch, of course: I thought he was dead? 

REGINA. He's only pretending: to teach her a lesson. Only he is 
dead, Peter, I saw him; he's not pretending. Somebody threw him 
off a train. Charles was mixed up in something terrible. [Turning 
to Peter] What am I going to do? 

PETER. I wish you'd let me help you: it doesn't sound the sort of 
thing a young woman can handle by herself. [The Inspector, spying 
from behind, appears engrossed in the performance as the 
Policeman is attacked by the other puppets] How about making me 
vice president in charge of cheering you up? 

REGINA. Starting tonight? 



 A drum roll. In a nightclub: the audience's attention is on the 
stage and a spotlight falls on the announcer. He greets the 
audience in French, English, and Spanish: Bonsoir, monsieurs et 
'dames. Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Buenos seiras, 
senors, senoris. He continues for a time: "l'attraction, c'est 
vous!", etc. 



PETER [to Regina—they are sat at a table] What's going on? 

REGINA. Fun and games. Evidently we're the floorshow. 

PETER. You and me? 

REGINA. Come on. [She leads in onto the floor with some of the 
rest of the audience].  The announcer explains the rules to the 
game in several languages, placing an orange under the chins of 
two women from the audience: "There are two things for everything 
that is one orange. Pass the orange to the person behind you, 
without the use of your hands." He then says: "Are you ready? 
Uno, dous, et treis" then blows on a whistle. The band starts 
playing as the game gets underway.  Peter has the task of 
removing an orange from a large woman's chin. With some 
difficulty he grasps it, almost losing it several times, and 
transfers it to Reggie. The other audience members pass the other 
orange between themselves. Grasping the orange between their two 
bodies, Peter and Regina stop starring into each other's eyes, 
smiling, then continue.  Regina works the orange under her chin 
and takes it over to the next man. It's the first man from the 
funeral. 

GIDEON. Mrs. Lampert. 

REGINA. Who are you? 

GIDEON. Didn't Charles tell you, Mrs. Lampert? 

REGINA [suddenly scared] Tell me what? 

GIDEON. It doesn't belong to you—you do know that, don't you? 

REGINA [growing frantic] I don't know anything—! 

GIDEON [firmly] Mrs. Lampert! Any morning now you could wake up 
dead, Mrs Lampert. 

REGINA. Leave me alone! 

GIDEON [firmly] Dead, Mrs. Lampert, like last weeks' news—like 
Charles, Mrs. Lampert. 

REGINA [angrily and scared] Stop it! [She kicks him hard in the 
shin]. 

PETER. What's the trouble? 

REGINA [putting on her top] He stepped on my foot. 

GIDEON [grimacing in pain, still holding the orange under his 
chin] Forgive me. 

REGINA [taking her handbag] Wait here; I won't be long. 

GIDEON [as Reggie runs past him toward an exit] It was quite 
unintentional, I'm sure.  Running down the stairs outside the 
club, she finds a phone booth. She goes inside and dials a 
number. 

REGINA [still calming down] Mr. Bartholomew: this is Regina 
Lampert; Mr. Bartholomew: I just saw one of those men—. Mr. 
Bartholomew: can you hear me? [She presses a button on the phone] 
Mr. Bartholomew: this is Regina Lampert; I just—. [She stops as 
the door of the booth opens. There is a man standing in the 
doorway (the second from the funeral), cigarette in mouth. She 
tries to leave but he blocks her way. 

TEX [smiling] Howdie. 

REGINA [scared] What do you want? 

TEX. Now you must be kiddin'. 

REGINA. No, I'm not. 

TEX. Now, come on now, Miss Lampert. You know what it is? [Taking 
out a match from the box he places on top of the phone beside 
her] And you're gonna get it for me too. 'Cause you know I ain't 
foolin' around here. [He lights the match then his cigarette. He 
holds the match towards her face] No siree, Bob.  Regina stands 
against the rear of the phone terrified as Tex pushes the match 
closer. He suddenly drops the match which lands on her clothing. 
Regina frantically puts it out. 

REGINA. No—! that—! please stop! 

TEX. Now don't make too much noise, Miss Lampert. 

REGINA [Regina screams as Tex strikes another match] Ah! 

TEX [putting the match near her face, wavering it along her 
cheek] It could get a whole lot worse, you know. [He drops it and 
she brushes it off her] Now, it belongs to me, Miss Lampert; 
[lighting another match] and you gonna get it for me [dropping it 
on her, immediately lighting another] or your life ain't gonna be 
worth the [dropping it] paper it's printed on. 

REGINA [frantically brushing the matches away] Stop! Ah—! 

TEX [lighting them faster] You understand what I'm sayin' to you? 
[lighting and dropping another]. 

REGINA [as she keeps brushing them off her] Stop! stop! please 
stop! 

TEX [he keeps dropping on her, relentlessly] Now you go home and 
think it over real careful right now, you here? 

REGINA [screaming in panic as she brushes the matches away] 
You're insane! You're absolutely insane! [Tex has opened the door 
and, smiling at her quivering in the booth, closes the door 
behind him].  Regina shakily puts a cigarette in her mouth. She 
screams as the door opens again. 

PETER. What's the matter? What are you doing in here? 

REGINA [her voice shivering with fright] I'm having a nervous 
breakdown. 



 Regina and Peter are returning to her hotel, the attendant 
asleep in a chair. Regina takes her key from the rack and turns 
back, stopped by Peter. 



PETER. Now, hold it. I've waited long enough—what happened back 
there? 

REGINA. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to tell or not. 

PETER. What does that mean? 

REGINA. He said if I told anybody it could prove fatal for them 
as well for me. 

PETER. Who said? 

REGINA. That's what I'm not supposed to say! 

PETER. Er—[she walks past him to leave] Now stop that nonsense! 

REGINA. Stop bullying me; everybody's bullying me. 

PETER. I'm not bullying you—. 

REGINA [stopping at the lift door to face him] Yes, you were; you 
said it was nonsense. Being murdered in cold blood is not 
nonsense. Why don't you try it sometime? [She opens the door and 
turns back to him] Would you mind seeing me to the door? 

PETER. Of course not. [He follows her in]. 

REGINA. It's a good place for making friends. [The lift starts 
upwards]. 

PETER. You said this afternoon your husband was mixed up in 
something. 

REGINA [playfully running a finger down the front of his chin] 
How do you shave in there? 

PETER. What was it? 

REGINA. What was what? 

PETER. What your husband was mixed up in. 

REGINA. Look, I know it's asking you to stretch your imagination 
but, don't you think you could pretend just for a moment that I'm 
a woman? 

PETER. Now listen, I could already be arrested for transporting a 
minor above the first floor. [The lift reaches the top and Peter 
open the door] Here you are. 

REGINA. Where? 

PETER. On the street where you live. 

REGINA. How about once more around the park? 

PETER. How about getting out of here? Come on, child, out. [She 
walks out, he follows]. 

REGINA. Won't you come in for a minute? 

PETER. No, I won't. [Shuts the door behind him]. 

REGINA [walking to her door] I don't bite, you know—unless it's 
called for [turning to him]. 

PETER. How would you like a spanking? 

REGINA. How'd you like a punch in the nose? Stop treating me like 
a child! 	

PETER. Well, then, stop behaving like one. Now if you want to 
tell me what's troubling you, fine; if not, I'm tired, it's late, 
and I want to go home to bed. [He turns his head to see the lift 
start its way back down] Oh—. 

REGINA. Do you know what's wrong with you? 

PETER. No, what? 

REGINA [leaning towards him] Nothing.  Regina goes into her 
apartment, closes the door and turns on the light. She sees the 
room and screams. The room is in a mess and the third man from 
the funeral stands beside the bed. 

SCOBIE [angrily] Where is it, lady? 

REGINA [bewildered and scared] I don't know. [She back away as he 
comes slowly towards her. She looks, frightened, at the hook on 
his right arm]. 

SCOBIE. I want it. Give it to me; it's mine!  Regina screams as 
the man raises the hook threateningly. She escapes through the 
door as the hook crashes through the wood. 

REGINA [running, screaming down the stairs after Peter] Peter! 
Peter! [As he runs up] A man tried to kill me!  Peter opens the 
door and enters with an aggressive yell. Regina stares towards 
the room, hearing shouts as the two men struggle. After silence 
she tentatively enters the room. 

REGINA. Peter? Peter? [Looking around the apparently empty 
apartment] Peter, are you alright? [Hearing a slight groan she 
turns round to see Peter lifting himself up from behind the bed] 
Oh, Peter, are you hurt? 

PETER. I sprained my pride. How are you? 

REGINA. Scared. 

PETER. You'll be alright. Where did he go? 

REGINA. Out the window. 

PETER [climing over the bed to the open window] Well, lock the 
door and don't let anyone in except me. And close these windows 
after me. 

REGINA [as he walks out onto the platform] Be careful! 

PETER. You just took the words right out of my mouth.  Peter 
springs from the balcony outside her window to the next. A shadow 
moves inside the lit room as he passes by. It retreats further 
inside. 

ENGLISH WOMAN [panicked] Alistair! 

ENGLISH MAN. What is it now, Pamela? 

ENGLISH WOMAN. It happened again: another strange man peered in 
the window at me and then went away. 

ENGLISH MAN. Bad luck, Pamela!  Peter jumps to the next balcony. 
The three villains are talking inside the room. Peter stays 
outside, listening, peering around the side of the window. 

GIDEON. That was a dumb move! 

TEX. Herman: man, and then some! If you'd only let us know you 
was goin' up to her room we coulda done somethin' to keep her 
busy! Sneakin' off at her thataway by yourself. Man, what did you 
expect him to do: walk up and shake you by that hand o' yours? 

GIDEON. It was a dumb move, Herman, a dumb move! 

PETER [walking into the room] Yes: it was a dumb move, Herman. 
What is the matter with you? 

SCOBIE [threateningly] You want some more? 

GIDEON. Never mind that! Did you get the money? 

PETER. How could I with the three Marx brothers breathing down my 
neck. I thought we had an agreement. Now, the girl trusts me. If 
she's got the money, I'll find out about it—but you just leave me 
alone. 

SCOBIE. We took all the chances. The money belongs to us, not to 
him. 

PETER. Now don't be piggy, Herman. A third of nothing is nothing—
just think about that. But make up your mind—she's waiting for 
me. 

GIDEON. I don't see how another twenty-four hours could hurt 
anything. 

PETER. If she'd been holdin' out* after all these years then he 
gets it out of your share, not mine. [He opens the door, standing 
in it] Not mine. [He leaves]. 

PETER. Either one of you got the room next to her? 

TEX. Yeah, I have; why? 

PETER. Give me the key. Get yourself another room, I want to use 
it. 

TEX. Mmm. [He reaches inside a pocket and gives it to him. To 
Peter as he goes to the door] But if you do find that money, you 
ain't gonna forget to tell your buddies about it, are you? 

PETER. Don't worry. 

TEX [with a laugh] Oh, no, I ain't worryin'. [Putting his arm on 
Gideon's shoulder] You see this little fella here? Oh he worries, 
and he's even meaner than I am.  Peter goes out the door and 
walks along the corridor to Regina's door. He knocks. 

REGINA. Who is it? 

PETER. It's me, Peter. [Regina opens the door and he enters. She 
quickly closes it behind him and hugs him for comfort. She walks 
back into the room and resumes her cleanup]. There was no trace 
of him. [Picking up a loose sheet as she tucks one in on the bed] 
Why don't you confide in me, and tell me what this is all about? 

REGINA [turning to him] There's three men; he's one of them. They 
think I have a quarter of a million dollars that belongs to them. 
[She carries on]. 

PETER. Go on. [Puts the sheet on the dresser, sitting against the 
table]. 

REGINA. That's all. 

PETER. No, it isn't: where's the money? 

REGINA. I don't know! They killed Charles to get it but he must 
not have had it with him on the train. 

PETER. So they think he left it with you? 

REGINA. But he didn't; I've looked everywhere and if I don't find 
it they're going to kill me. [She sits on the bed]. 

PETER [going over to her] No, they won't; I won't let them. 

REGINA. Peter: help me—you're the only one I can trust. 

PETER [putting his hand around her, sitting on the bed] I'll help 
you. [Holding her to close, her head on his shoulder] I told you 
I would. Come on. 

REGINA. Oh, I'm so hungry I could faint. [Sitting up, tears in 
her eyes] And I've gotten your suit all wet. 

PETER. That's alright, it's a drip-dry [he reaches in a pocket 
and gives her a handkerchief]. Wipe your eyes. 

REGINA. Promise me you'll never lie to me like Charles did; why 
do people have to tell lies? 

PETER. Usually because they want something and are afraid the 
truth won't get it for them. 

REGINA. Do you tell lies?  The phone rings. Regina walks over and 
answers it. 

REGINA. Hello? 

SCOBIE [calling from a public phone, probably in a 
cafe/restaurant] Mrs. Lampert: it's me—the man who was in your 
room a few minutes ago. 

REGINA. What do you want? 

PETER. Who is it? 

REGINA. It's the man you had the fight with. 

SCOBIE. Is Dyle with you? 

REGINA. Who? 

SCOBIE. The man I had the fight with, lady—Dyle, that's his name. 
What's wrong, is he still there? 

REGINA [she looks up at Peter then turns with her back to him] 
Yes, that's right. 

PETER. What's he saying? 

SCOBIE. Don't trust him; don't tell him anything. He's after the 
money. [He hangs up].  Regina puts the phone down and turns 
around to face Dyle. 

DYLE [standing up] What was all that about? 

REGINA. He- he said if I don't give him the money, he'll kill me. 

DYLE [walking towards her; Regina's eyes widen in fear] Oh, don't 
take it seriously. He's just trying to frighten you. 

REGINA. I believe what he said. 

DYLE. No, no, it's just a lot of words. 

REGINA. Words can hurt. 

DYLE. I know. [Holding her] Try to get some sleep; you'll feel 
better. And don't worry, I've arranged to take the room next door 
to you [Regina blinks]. So you'll be alright. [Walking to the 
door] If you want anything, bang on the wall. Better lock the 
door after me. [With a wave] Goodnight [he closes the door].  
Outside, Dyle takes out a string, attaching one end to his door, 
and running it tight close to the floor to Regina's door. 

REGINA [talking on the phone in a loud whisper] But I am calm, 
Mr. Bartholomew. What I'm trying to say is that- is that there's 
someone else. 

BARTHOLOMEW [talking to the phone from his bed] What? 

REGINA. Someone who wasn't in that photograph you showed me 
today. He says his name is Peter Joshua but it isn't—it's Dyle. 
[Bartholomew pauses] Are you still there, Mr. Bartholomew? 

BARTHOLOMEW. Er yes, yes, Mrs. Lampert. Er, I don't know who this 
Mr. Dyle is but it's just possible we were wrong about who killed 
your husband. 

REGINA [wide-eyed] You mean... he might have? Mr. Bartholomew, 
I'm catching the next plane out of here. I- I- I'm not going to 
sit around for someone to make chopped liver out of me. 

BARTHOLOMEW [quickly, sitting up a bit] Now, take it easy, Mrs. 
Lampert, take it easy. Er, where are you now?—Can you meet me, 
er, at the market? 

REGINA. At Laialles? 

BARTHOLOMEW. Yes, opposite San Eustache. I'll meet you there in 
fifteen minutes. 

REGINA. Alright, I'll be there; in fifteen minutes.  Regina hangs 
up and goes over to the door, putting her ear against it. She 
bends down to look through the keyhole into the next room where 
Dyle is placing his jacket on a chair. Regina picks up her 
handbag and goes out the front door. The door pulls the string 
and a key attached to the end is pulled along Dyle's room's 
floor. Peter gets up, taking his jacket. As Regina goes down the 
stairs she hears Peter open the door so she hurries down. Peter 
puts on his jacket as he follows her.  Downstairs, Regina runs 
outside and around the side of a waiting taxi, and in French 
tells the driver to go. Regina waits for the next taxi behind to 
pull into place. Dyle runs out through the lobby and outside and, 
seeing the taxi leaving, tells the driver: "Suivez le taxi!" He 
gets in and it pulls away, revealing Regina hiding behind it. She 
watches it leave, relieved. 



 Later and Regina is walking down a street through a market area. 
It is after hours and people are moving goods around. 



BARTHOLOMEW. Were you followed? 

REGINA. Yes, by Dyle, but I lost him. I'm beginning to think 
women make the best spies. 

BARTHOLOMEW [correcting her] Agents. 

REGINA [seriously] He has a gun, Mr. Bartholomew. 

BARTHOLOMEW. No. 

REGINA. But I saw it! 

BARTHOLOMEW. No, that's not Carson Dyle. 

REGINA. Carson? 

BARTHOLOMEW. There's only one Carson connected with this affair, 
Mrs. Lampert, that's Carson Dyle. 

REGINA [to Bartholomew as he stops, turning to the side] You mean 
you've known about him all along? 

BARTHOLOMEW [he nods then motions past her to what he's looking 
at: a meat house] It's enough to make you a vegetarian, isn't it? 

REGINA. It's just lucky that I'm not hanging next to one of those 
things right now. [They continue on] Why didn't you tell me you 
knew about Dyle? 

BARTHOLOMEW. I didn't see any point: Dyle's dead. 

REGINA [she stop and he turns back at her] Mr. Bartholomew: what 
is all this about?  Bartholomew is sitting down, looking at 
Regina as he talks. They are inside a restaurant. 

BARTHOLOMEW [talking in a slow confidential tone] In nineteen 
fourty-four, five members of the O.S.S.—the military espionage 
unit—were ordered behind German lines for the purpose of 
delivering two hundred and fifty thousand dollars in gold to the 
French underground. The five men were, of course, your husband 
Charles; the three men who showed up at his funeral yesterday; 
and Carson Dyle. 

REGINA. Oh. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Instead of delivering the gold, they stole it. 

REGINA. How? 

BARTHOLOMEW [continuing slowly] By burying it then reporting that 
the Germans had captured it. All they had to do was come back 
after the war, dig it up, split it five ways. Quarter of a 
million dollars with no questions asked. 

REGINA. May I have a cigarette, please? [As she takes one and 
puts it in her mouth] I can't stand those things; it's like 
drinking coffee through a veil. [Bartholomew lights her 
cigarette]. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Everything went smoothly enough until after the gold 
was buried. Then, before they could get out they were ambushed by 
a German patrol [Regina's expression turns serious]. A machine 
gun separated Scobie from his right hand, caught Carson Dyle full 
in the stomach. [Regina nervously gives him her cigarette and 
takes another one] What was wrong with that one? 

REGINA. Nothing, I guess. What happened then? 

BARTHOLOMEW. Have you any idea what these things cost over here? 

REGINA. Please go on, Mr. Bartholomew: what happened then? 

BARTHOLOMEW. Carson Dyle was dead but Scobie was able to travel, 
so—.  The waiter comes over, saying something in French. 

REGINA [to the waiter] Pour moi. [The waiter gives her something 
and Bartholomew a cup of coffee. The waiter leaves]. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Where was I? 

REGINA. Carson Dyle was dead. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Yes, Carson Dyle was dead. The others finally got 
back to the base and waited for the war to end, only Charles 
couldn't wait quite as long as the others. He beat them back to 
the gold, took everything for himself, and disappeared. It's 
taken Gideon, Tex and Scobie all this time to catch up with him 
again. 

REGINA [loudly] But if they stole all that money, why can't you 
arrest them? 

BARTHOLOMEW. Ssshhhh. We know what happened from the bits and 
pieces we were able to piece together. We still have no proof. 

REGINA. What's this got to do with the C.I.O.? 

BARTHOLOMEW. C.I.A., Mrs. Lampert. It's an extension of the 
wartime O.S.S. It's our money and we want it back. 

REGINA. I'm sorry, Mr. Bartholomew, but nothing you've said has 
changed my mind. I'm leaving Paris tonight. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Wouldn't advise that, Mrs. Lampert. Better consider 
what happened to your husband when he tried to leave. Those men 
won't be very far away no matter where you go. In fact, I don't 
see any point in your changing hotels. Now, please help us, Mrs. 
Lampert; your government is counting on you. 

REGINA [she sighs] Well, I suppose if I'm going to die I'd might 
as well do it for my country. 

BARTHOLOMEW. That's the spirit. Here's what I want you to do: 
we're anxious to know who this man is, the one calling himself 
Dyle. I want you to find out. 

REGINA. Why me? 

BARTHOLOMEW. You're in an ideal position; he trusts you. Besides, 
you yourself said women make the best spies. 

REGINA. Agents. 



The next day. Dyle is leaving the hotel, watched inconspicuously 
by Regina from a window adjacent to the hotel entrance. As he 
leaves she runs around to the front but stops suddenly, almost 
running into Dyle. He has stopped by a window where a woman is 
shaking the dust out of a mat, cleaning the dust out of his eyes. 



WOMAN [seeing Dyle standing there] Oh, pardon.  From the door, 
Regina watches him continue, and after putting on her dark 
glasses follows him.  Later, Regina follows him along a busy 
street. He walks by a sidewalk cafe and turns back to look at the 
painting someone is working on on the pavement. Regina quickly 
ducks, sitting down at one of the cafe tables, where a man is sat 
reading a book. He sits up and looks at her eagerly. Dyle 
continues and Regina gets up to continue. The man gets up after 
her. 

CAFE PATRON. Frauline. Frauline! 

REGINA [hardly taking her eyes off Dyle] What are you doing 
following me, it's gonna look like a parade! Stop it!  Dyle 
starts to cross the road but has to step back to avoid a car, 
beeping its horn. Regina turns round quickly, walking back and 
taking the arm of the man on his way back to his table. 

REGINA[very friendly, talking quickly] How are you? How nice to 
see you. When did you arrive? It's a lovely town to stay. Are you 
having a good time? [They sit at the table] So many things to 
see...  The lights change for Dyle and he continues on. Regina 
looks towards him and she gets up quickly to follow. 

CAFE PATRON [running to follow her] Frauline. Frauline! 

REGINA [stopping; firmly] If you don't stop following me I'll 
call the police! [the man stands bewildered. She sees Dyle 
running to catch a moving bus] Taxi! [Dyle jumps on the bus and 
then her taxi pulls up].  Dyle enters the American Express post 
office building, followed by Regina. He walks down the stairs to 
the next floor and she takes off her glass to follow.  Regina 
looks at a sign on the counter: "A to D". Dyle talks to the clerk 
at the counter. 

DYLE. Dyle, please: D, Y, L, E. 

WOMAN AT DESK Yes, Mr. Dyle, I remember. [Regina looks on from 
where she is watching then walks somewhere else] No, I'm sorry, 
Mr. Dyle; nothing today. 

DYLE. Thank you. [He is on his way to the exit when the speaker 
announces his name]. 

SPEAKER. Mr. Dyle, please. You're wanted on the telephone. Mr. 
Dyle, cabin four. Mr. Dyle, cabin four, please.  He goes into 
booth four on the end, two away from Regina. 

DYLE [picks up the phone] Yes? 

REGINA. Good morning, Mr. Dyle. 

DYLE. Reggie? 

REGINA. The only name I've got—how about you? 

DYLE. Now, no cat and mouse; you've got me. What do you want to 
know? 

REGINA. Why you lied to me! 

DYLE. I had to. For all I knew you were in on the whole thing. 

REGINA. I'm trying to find out who you are. 

DYLE. But you know my name: it's Dyle. 

REGINA. Carson Dyle is dead. 

DYLE. Yes, he is. He was my brother. 

REGINA. Your brother? 

DYLE. The army thinks he was killed in action by the Germans; but 
I think they did it: Tex, Gideon, Scobie, and your husband 
because my brother wouldn't go along with their scheme to steal 
the gold. I think he threatened to turn them in and they killed 
him, and I'm trying to prove it. They think I'm working with 
them; but I'm not, Reggie. I'm on your side. Just believe that. 

REGINA. How can I? You lied to me just the way Charles did—after 
promising you wouldn't. Oh, I want to believe you, Peter— I can't 
call you that anymore, can I? Take me a while to get used to your 
new name. What is it? [she waits] Hmm? Hello? Hello???  She gets 
out of the booth and walks to Dyle's booth, where the phone is 
hanging off the hook. She stands looking about the room, but 
doesn't see him. 



 Scobie has caught up with Dyle. He is holding a gun, pointed at 
him through his pocket. Scobie points him towards a lift. 



SCOBIE. Do anything funny or try to talk to anyone and I'll kill 
you, Dyle [he waves his gun threatenlingly]. 

DYLE. You'll wreck your raincoat.  They go into the lift and a 
woman tries to join them. 	

SCOBIE. Take the next car, please. [The woman sees what he is 
pointing at Dyle and backs away immediately].  Scobie selects a 
floor as the lift doors close. The lift starts its way up and the 
stare at each other. The lift stops at the sixth floor (the 
highest on the panel) and Dyle gets out, followed by Scobie. 

DYLE. Look out. Didn't want you to bump your head. 

SCOBIE [looks around then motions to a door] Now, get in there. 
[He closes the door behind them, taking out his gun and holding 
it in his hook] Alright, turn around. [He turns round slowly. 
Scobie frisks Dyle's jacket, taking out his gun] Now sit down. 
[Dyle sits on the stair, watched by Scobie]. 

DYLE. Now what? 

SCOBIE. We wait. With our mouths shut. 

DYLE [he yawns, mouth wide open] Oh, I'm sorry about that.  Later 
on, outside in the dark, a man locks up. Scobie and Dyle are 
still in their respective positions. Scobie hears the jingle of 
the man's keys outside. 

SCOBIE. Ok, up there. 

DYLE [he walks up the few steps to the door, followed behind by 
Scobie] Do I knock or something? 

SCOBIE. No, open it. And keep right on goin'. 

DYLE [he opens the door and enters, talking back to Scobie] The 
view, it better be worth it. [They walk out onto the roof of the 
building, where a large neon sign stands on the sloped edge]. 
Very pretty. Now what? [Scobie motions towards the edge]. I was 
afraid of that. 

SCOBIE. I'll give you a chance, Dyle, which is more than you'd 
give me: Where's the money? 

DYLE. Is that why you dragged me all the way up here, to ask me 
that? She has it. 

SCOBIE. And I say maybe you both have it. One more time, Dyle. 
Where is it? 

DYLE. Supposing I had it—which I don't—do you really think I'd 
just hand it over to you? 

SCOBIE. Step back. 

DYLE [looking down past the slope past the huge American Express 
sign.] Back where? 

SCOBIE. That's the idea. 

DYLE. Hmmm. Now, now just a minute; take it easy.  Dyle suddenly 
kicks, knocking Scobie's hand holding the gun skywards. Dyle 
rushes to grab it and it fires. Dyle punches Scobie several 
times, knocking him backwards and dropping the gun. The both dive 
for it but Scobie knocks it away with his hooked hand before Dyle 
can reach it. It slides down the side of the building out of 
reach. They get up and Scobie pushes Dyle backwards, holding him 
at the edge as Dyle wrestles with him, trying to keep his hook 
away from his face. Dyle throws him back with all his strength 
and they wrestle but Scobie picks him up as Dyle struggles. Dyle 
manages to hold on to a support but Scobie pushes him away, 
ripping Dyle's jacket. Scobie holds his face in pain as Dyle 
tries to stop himself falling down the side. Scobie comes at Dyle 
again and they wrestle further, Scobie pushing him into a wall 
and Dyle jumping on him, knocking him to the ground. Scobie 
throws him off and Dyle rolls down the side, holding on to the 
edge by his fingers. As Scobie tries to kick him down Dyle grabs 
his leg, throwing him off-balance, backwards. Dyle climbs back 
up, making for the door but Scobie blocks him, lunging with his 
hook, but Dyle evades his swings. As Scobies thrusts again, Dyle 
dodges, but Scobie has already lost his balance and falls, 
sliding down the side: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Sparks fly from 
his hook as he trys in vain to stop himself. He disappears in the 
blackness.  Dyle peers over the side, kneeling on the ground. 

DYLE. Herman? 

SCOBIE [he is hanging from the side of the building by his hook] 
What? 

DYLE [chuckles] How are you doing? 

SCOBIE. How do you think?! 

DYLE. If you get bored, try writing love thy neighbour a hundred 
times on the side of the building.  Dyle leaves Scobie hanging on 
the side of the building.



 Dyle gets out of the lift, on the floor of his and Regina's 
apartments. There is a man fixing the holes in Regina's door from 
Scobie's hook the night before. 



REPAIRMAN. Monsieur, next time, please, use the keyhole.  Dyle 
unlocks the Regina's door and goes in.  Inside, Regina gets off 
her bed and runs over to the door of her room—her head against 
it, listening. 

REGINA. Is that you? 

DYLE. Yeah. 

REGINA. You gonna open up? 

DYLE. Sure, wait a minute. 

REGINA [the lock clicks and the door opens] Don't you know it's 
impolite to leave someone holding...[she sees the rip in his 
jackets he's holding] the phone. What happened? 

DYLE. Oh, I met a man with sharp nails. 

REGINA [she turns him round, looking at his back] Scobie? 

DYLE. Mmm-hmm. I left him hanging around the American Express. 

REGINA. Come in; [going into the next room] I've got something 
that stings like crazy. 

DYLE. Yeah, you're the kind of girl who'd have something like 
that. 

REGINA. Sit down. 

DYLE [reaching for the chair, turning to look at what she has 
brought in] Er, wait, wait, wait, wait a moment, wh- what is that 
stuff? 

REGINA [she takes out some cotton wool as he sits on the chair, 
in reverse] Marvellous stuff. It's gonna hurt you much more than 
it's gonna hurt me. 

DYLE. I'll bet—[as Regina rips his shirt open at the back] oh! 
Did you hear something rip? 

REGINA. No. 

DYLE. Oh, that's odd. [In pain as she dabs the antiseptic on] Oh! 
Listen, I- I only came here for an estimate. 

REGINA. Sit still. It's not too bad. 

DYLE. Oh. 

REGINA. You won't be able to lie on your back for a few days; but 
then you can lie from any position, can't you? 

DYLE. Oh, oh... 

REGINA. Does it hurt? 

DYLE. No, no...—What, what? 

REGINA. Does it hurt? 

DYLE. Oh, are you kidding? Have you got a bullet I can bite, like 
they do in the movies? 

REGINA. Are you really Carson Dyle's brother? 

DYLE [loosening his tie] Well, would you like to see my passport? 

REGINA. Passport—what kind of a proof is that? 

DYLE. No? Would you like to see where I was tattooed? 

REGINA. Yes. 

DYLE. Alright, we'll drive around that way. 

REGINA. Could at least tell me what your first name is these 
days. 

DYLE. Alexander. 

REGINA. Ok, Alexander: you're done. 

DYLE. Good. 

REGINA [as he gets up] You're a new man. 

DYLE [walking to his room via the connecting door] I'm sorry the 
old one couldn't tell you the truth but I had to find out your 
part in all this. 

REGINA [sitting down] Is there a Mrs. Dyle? 

DYLE. Yes. But we're divorced. 

REGINA. I thought that was Peter Joshua? 

DYLE. I'm just as difficult to live with as he was. 

REGINA. Alex: how can you tell if someone's lying or not? 

DYLE [coming back in, putting on a new shirt] You can't. 

REGINA. There must be some way. 

DYLE. Now, now, there's an old ridle about two tribes of Indians. 
[Buttoning his cuffs] The whitefeet always tell the truth and the 
blackfeet always lie. So one day you meet an Indian. You say: 
Hey, Indian, what are you: a truthful whitefoot or a lying 
blackfoot? He says, I'm a truthful whitefoot. Well, which is he? 

REGINA. Well, why couldn't you just look at his feet? 

DYLE. Because he's wearing mocassins. 

REGINA. Well, then, he's a truthful whitefoot, of course. 

DYLE. Well, why not a lying blackfoot? 

REGINA. Which one are you? 

DYLE [buttoning his shirt] A truthful whitefoot. 

REGINA. Come in. Sit down. 

DYLE. Why, do you want to look at my feet? [he goes to sit down]. 

REGINA. Yes [she walks over to him and sits on his lap]. 

DYLE. Uh-oh, oh... hey, knock it off, knock it off. Now, come on, 
Reggie, listen to me. 

REGINA. Ah, here it comes: the fatherly talk. You forget I'm 
already a widow. 

DYLE. So was Juliet at fifteen. 

REGINA. Mmm, but I'm not fifteen. 

DYLE. Well, that's your trouble: you're too old for me. 

REGINA. Can't you be serious? 

DYLE. Oh, you just said an horrible word. 

REGINA [laughing] What did I say? 

DYLE. Serious. When a man gets to be my age that's the last word 
he ever wants to hear. I don't want to be serious. I especially 
don't want you to be. 

REGINA. Ok, we'll just sit around all day long being frivolous; 
how about that? Hmm? [she starts kissing him on his cheek]. 

DYLE. Reggie: cut it out. 

REGINA [she stops and sits up] Ok. 

DYLE. Well, now what are you doing? 

REGINA. Cutting it out. 

DYLE. Who told you to do that? 

REGINA. You did. 

DYLE. Oh, I'm not through complaining yet. 

REGINA [smiling; sexily] Oh... [she leans forward and starts to 
kiss him again] 

DYLE. Now, cut it out. 

REGINA. Alex, I think I love you. [They kiss and then the 
telephone starts ringing]. 

DYLE. Hey, the telephone's ringing. 

REGINA [continuing to kiss him] Mmm, never mind. Whoever it is 
won't give up. And neither will I. 

DYLE [reaching for the phone] Just a minute, here. [Handing her 
the receiver] Come on, take it. 

REGINA [to the phone] Hello. I'm sorry, er... [still kissing him] 
I was just, er... nibbling on something. 

TEX [lying in bed, watched over by Gideon] Say, I'd appreciate it 
mighty highly if you'd, er, wiggle on over to room forty-six and 
chew the fat for a spell. 

REGINA. Could you give me one good reason why I should? 

TEX. Yeah: a little one; about six or seven. Keeps calling for 
Aunt Reggie. [Laughs] Ain't that cute? 

REGINA [covering the receiver] They've got Jean-Louis! [To the 
phone] I'll be right there.  In one of the villains' rooms Scobie 
has Jean-Louis sitting on his lap. 

SCOBIE. Hey, Tex, do somethin' with this kid, will ya'? my whole 
leg's goin' to sleep. 

TEX [lifting Jean-Louis and onto the drawers] Oopsy daisy. 

JEAN-LOUIS. Are you a real cowboy? 

TEX. Huh, yeah, sure am, kid. 

JEAN-LOUIS. So where's your gun? [Tex takes it out and twirls it 
around]. 

GIDEON. Will you put that thing away?!  Regina enters, followed 
by Dyle. 

REGINA. Jean-Louis! 

TEX. Howdy, Miss Lampert. 

SCOBIE. Now, who invited him? 

DYLE [still tucking his shirt in] Well, Herman, see you had a 
happy landing. 

REGINA. I must call Sylvie right away, I—. 

GIDEON [slams the door shut] I'm afraid that'll have to wait, 
Mrs. Lampert. 

REGINA. It's his mother. 

GIDEON. She won't be anybody's mother unless you answer some 
questions! 

TEX. 'S ain't no game, Mrs. Lampert. 

SCOBIE. We want that money now! 

DYLE. Why don't you keep quiet and stop threatening the child? He 
hasn't got the money. And neither has Mrs. Lampert. 

SCOBIE. Then who does? 

DYLE. I don't know, Herman; maybe you do. 

SCOBIE. Me? 

DYLE. Or you. 

TEX. Oh... 

DYLE. Or him. 

GIDEON. Why, that's the most ridiculous thing I ever—. 

SCOBIE [to the other two] Listen to this man. 

TEX. Man's goin' to loco*. 

DYLE. Now hold it. Suppose one of you found Charles here in 
Paris—even bumped into him by accident; followed him when he 
tried to run out again; cornered him on the train; threw him out 
the window and without bothering to tell the other two took all 
the money for yourself. 

SCOBIE. If one of us did that he wouldn't hang around here 
waitin' for the other two to figure it out. 

DYLE. But he'd have to, don't you see? If he left, he'd be 
admitting his guilt. Whoever it is has to wait here, pretending 
to look for the money, waiting for the rest of us to give up and 
go home. 

SCOBIE. He's just tryin' to throw us off. They got it, I tell ya. 
Why don't we search the rooms? 

DYLE. That's alright with us. 

TEX [tucking his gun back in] Well then, what are we wastin' time 
for; let's go. 

DYLE. While we're waiting, we'll search yours. 

SCOBIE. Not my room! 

DYLE. Well, Herman. You have something to hide? Then there are no 
objections. Alright, here's my key. 

SCOBIE [snatching it from him as he leaves] I'll take that. 

REGINA. My room's open. 

DYLE [stopping Gideon on his way out] Hey, wait a minute—. [He 
motions for him to hand over his key]. 

TEX [on his way out; holding his hands up, surrendering] Now, you 
two just make yourselves to home here. 

DYLE. Well, let's get busy. Come on, Jean-Louis, come along. 
[Lifting him up] Oh, that's fine. Who gets your vote? 

REGINA [as Dyle puts Jean-Louis down on the bed] Scobie—he's the 
one that objected. 

DYLE. Alright, I'll take Tex's room here and Gideon's. You take 
Jean-Louis with you and bolt the door from inside. 

REGINA [her arm around Jean-Louis] Come on, Jean-Louis, we'll 
have a treasure hunt, ok? [she takes his hand to lead him out].  
In Regina's room, Gideon is opening a Lufthansa travel bag while 
Tex goes through the drawers. 

GIDEON. Tex? 

TEX [looking at the materials he takes out of the bag] Man, it's 
Charlie's stuff. 

GIDEON. Looks like, eh? 

TEX. You gonna call Herman? 

GIDEON. What for? If it's not here why bother 'im? 

TEX. And if it is? 

GIDEON. Why bother 'im? [Tex laughs and Gideon chuckles with 
him]. 

TEX. Sure there's nothin' missin'? 

GIDEON [opening an envelope from the bag and looking at the 
paper] No, everything's here: the police have kindly provided us 
with a list. 

TEX. Sure ain't nothin' here worth no quarter of a million 
dollars. 

GIDEON. Not unless we're blind. [Going over to the wardrobe] I 
keep tellin' myself: we've stolen a great deal of money, but up 
to now I'm yet to see a penny of it. 

TEX. You think maybe we're fishin' up the wrong stream? 

GIDEON. Meanin' what? 

TEX. Suppose one of us has it, you know, like the man says? Now, 
that'd be mighty distasteful, us bein' veterans of the war same 
war, an' all. 	

GIDEON [walking over, face to face with Tex] Well, you know I'd 
tell you if I had it. 

TEX. Oh, naturally; just like I'd tell you if I had it. 

GIDEON. Naturally. And that goes for Herman too. 

TEX & GIDEON. Naturally!  Regina lies on a bed with Jean-Louis in 
her lap, talking on the phone. 

REGINA. He's alright, Sylvie, honestly. Just hurry over as soon 
as you can. Ok, goodbye [she puts the phone down]. Now: if you 
had a treasure, where would you hide it? 

JEAN-LOUIS. I would bury it in the garden. 

REGINA. Swell, but this man doesn't have a garden. 

JEAN-LOUIS. Oh, neither do I. 

REGINA. You don't? Well, if you'd hide it in this room where 
would you put it? 

JEAN-LOUIS [they look around] Up there. 

REGINA. On top of that cupboard? You know something: you may be 
right! [She goes over to the cupboard, taking a chair and 
climbing on to reach the top] Oh, I hope I don't find any hairy 
little things living up here. Hey, there is something! and it's 
heavy. [Regina pulls a suitcase into view]. 

JEAN-LOUIS [jumping up and down] I found it, I found it, I found 
it, I found it. 

REGINA. If you think you're getting credit for this, you're 
crazy. 

JEAN-LOUIS [running out into the hall] We won, we won, we won. We 
won, we won, we won. [To the men as they run out of their rooms: 
Dyle, then Tex, then Gideon] We found it, we found it. 

DYLE. Did you find it? 

REGINA [Regina stands against the wall] No. 

GIDEON. What d'you mean, no? 

TEX. Yeah, the kid was yellin' there—. 

JEAN-LOUIS [jumping, pointing to the top of the cupboard] Up 
there, it's up there. 

REGINA. Believe me, there's nothing up there. 

TEX [taking the chair over] Oh yeah? [He climbs on and peers over 
the top, seeing the case] Oh! [He looks at Gideon, smiling, then 
takes the case down, puts it on the bed, and opens it. It 
contains a hook] Jumpin' freehole, these are Herman's spare. 
[Gideon looks on, disappointed]. 

REGINA. Where is he? 

DYLE. He's over in my room. [They look at each other in silence 
then go out and across the hall into Dyle's room. There's a 
puddle of water forming outside the bathroom door, the sound of 
rushing water inside]. You'd better take the boy out in the hall.  
Dyle opens the door and they look inside: Scobie is lying in the 
bath completely submerged, his eyes open. 

TEX [as Dyle turns off the taps] Oh, now who would have done a 
mean thing like that? 

DYLE. I'm not quite sure. 

TEX. Well, this ain't my room. 

GIDEON. Mine neither. 

DYLE. Oh, the police aren't gonna like this a bit. [He shakes his 
head, tutting, as he goes out. The other two go in for a closer 
look]. 

GIDEON. We- we could dry him off and take him down the hall to 
his own room. He really doesn't look too bad. 

TEX [looking at the body] Oh, poor ol' Herman. Seems like him and 
good luck always was strangers. Well, maybe now he'll meet up 
with his other hand someplace.  In the morning the cleaning woman 
comes up, carrying a rag and mop. She looks into the room, her 
eyes fixed on something, and screams. It is Scobie's body, dried 
off and lying in bed, his eyes fixed on the ceiling. 



 Grandpierre's office. Grandpierre sits at his desk, facing 
Regina and Dyle. Tex looks on next to them, standing; Gideon in a 
chair round the side of the desk. 



GRANDPIERRE. A man, drowned in his bed? Impossible. And in his 
pyjamas—the second one in his pyjamas. C'est trop stupid. Stop 
lying to me. This nose tells me when you are lying; it is never 
mistaken—not in twenty-three years. This nose will make me 
commissaire of police. Mr. Dyle or Mr. Joshua: which is it? 

DYLE. Dyle. 

GRANDPIERRE. And yet you registered in measure as Mr. Joshua. 
Don't you know it was against the law to register under an 
assumed name? 

DYLE. No, I didn't. 

REGINA. It's done in America all the time. 

GRANDPIERRE. None of you will be permitted to leave Paris until 
this matter is cleared up! Only, I warn you: I will be watching. 
We use the guillotine in this country. I have always suspected 
that the blade, coming down, causes no more than a slight 
tickling sensation on the back of the neck. It is only a guess, 
of course. I hope none of you ever finds out for certain.  Gideon 
sneezes loudly. 



 Later on and Dyle and Regina are walking down by the Seine. 



REGINA. Who do you think did it? Gideon? 

DYLE. Possibly. 

REGINA. Or Tex? 

DYLE. Possibly. 

REGINA. You're a fat lot of help. 

DYLE. Mmm, that's right. 

REGINA [stopping as they pass an icecream stand] Can I have one 
of those? 

DYLE. One of what? 

REGINA. I think Tex did it. 

DYLE [as they go to the icecream stand] Oh. [Regina asks the 
icecream seller in French for an icecream]. Why do you think Tex 
did it? 

REGINA. Because I really suspect Gideon and it's always the 
person you don't suspect. 

DYLE. Do women think it feminine to be so illogical or can't they 
help it? 

REGINA. What's so illogical about that? 

DYLE. Well, you just said that it's always the one you don't 
suspect and you suspect Gideon so it must be Tex. But on the 
other hand if you suspect Tex it must be the other fellow, 
Gideon. 

REGINA. I guess they just can't help it. 

DYLE [as they continue, Regina licking her icecream] Hmm? who? 

REGINA. Women. 

DYLE. Oh. 

REGINA. You know, I can't help feeling rather sorry for Scobie. 
Wouldn't it be nice if we were like that? 

DYLE. What, like Scobie? 

REGINA. No, Gene Kelly. You remember when he danced down here by 
the river in An American in Paris without a care in the world? 

DYLE. Hmm. 

REGINA. You know, this is good. Want some? [she waves the 
icecream at him but the top come off, landing on his jacket. 
Regina laughs]. 

DYLE. No thanks. And I guess you don't, do you? Now give me that. 
[He takes the icecream]. 

REGINA. I'm sorry. [Dyle drops what's left into the river, 
licking a finger clean. Turning serious] Alex: I'm scared. 

DYLE [wiping his glasses] Yes, I know. 

REGINA. I can't think of any reason why he was killed. 

DYLE. Well, perhaps someone thought the four shares too many. 

REGINA. What makes you think this someone is going to be 
satisfied with three? He wants it all, Alex—that means we're in 
his way too. 

DYLE. That's right. 

REGINA. We've got to do something! I mean, any minute now we 
could be assassinated. Would you do anything like that? 

DYLE. What, assassinate someone? 

REGINA. No: swing down from there on a rope to save the woman you 
love. Like the Hunchback of Notre Dame. 

DYLE. Er— huh? [Looking up at Notre Dame cathedral] Oh, who put 
that there?  Later at the hotel. They exit the lift outside their 
rooms. 

REGINA. Hurry up and change; I'm starved. 

DYLE. Let me know what you wanna eat so I can pick out a suit 
that matches [laughs, comicly. They go inside].  Regina goes 
inside, taking off her hat in front of the mirror. She goes to 
the connecting door, trying to open it but it's locked. 

DYLE [loosening his tie] What do you want? 

REGINA [taking off her gloves] It's the house detective: why 
don't you have a girl in there? 

DYLE. God, you're a pest. [Goes over to the bathroom]. 

REGINA. Can I come in? 

DYLE. No! I'm gonna take a bath. 

REGINA. Ooh, wouldn't it better if you did it in here? 

DYLE. What for? 

REGINA. Well, I wouldn't want to use that tub. And anyway, I 
don't want to be alone; I'm afraid. 

DYLE. You're only next door; if anything happens, holler. [He 
goes into the bathroom].  Regina stands behind the door and 
screams at the top of her voice. Dyle runs from the bathroom into 
her room. 

DYLE [running in] Reggie? 

REGINA [she closes the door behind him, locking it] Gotcha! [she 
laughs]. 

DYLE [turning round] Did you ever hear the story of the boy who 
cried wolf? 

REGINA. The shower's in there. 

DYLE [walking to the door] Oh. Come on, Reggie, open the door 
[she doesn't move]. 

REGINA. This is a ludicrous situation: I think of a dozen men who 
are just longing to use my shower. 

DYLE. Well, why don't you call one of them? 

REGINA. I dare you. 

DYLE. Oh, you're a nut [he sits down, untying his shoes]. 

REGINA. What are you doing? 

DYLE. Taking off my shoes; what do you think I'm doing? Did you 
ever hear of anyone taking a shower with their shoes on? [Starts 
humming, going to the bathroom] I usually sing a medley of old 
favourites when I'm in the shower. [Stopping as he goes in] Oh: 
any requests? 

REGINA. Shut the door. 

DYLE. Oh, I'm afraid I don't know that one, Miss. [Continuing on] 
Well... 

REGINA. Shut the door! 

DYLE. Why? Come in and watch. [He turns on the shower and gets 
in, fully clothed. He sings, "do-de-do"ing, as he rubs himself 
down with soap. Regina stands agape] Drip-dry! 

REGINA. How often do you go through this little ritual? 

DYLE. Oh, every day; the manufacturer recommends it. 

REGINA. I don't believe it. 

DYLE. Oh yes, it's— wait a minute. Read the label... look, look 
at the small print: "Wearing this suit during washing helps 
protect its shape". Waterproof. [Pulling off his belt, holding it 
up] Acronylon, * resistant, plastic, [the phone rings] rust-
proof, fly-proof, proo-proof*! 

REGINA. You're the nut! [she shuts the door and, laughing, goes 
to answer the phone]. Yes? 

BARTHOLOMEW [in a room, probably a library, doing exercises: 
kneeling down then standing up, repeatedly, as he speaks] Mrs. 
Lampert: Bartholomew. I spoke to Washington, Mrs. Lampert. 

REGINA. Go ahead, Mr. Bartholomew, I'm listening. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Well, I er, told them what you said about this man 
being Carson Dyle's brother. [He stops the exercise] I asked them 
what they knew about it and they told me. You're not gonna like 
this, Mrs. Lampert: Carson Dyle had no brother. [Regina pauses] 
Mrs. Lampert? 

REGINA [grim-faced] Are you sure there's no mistake? 

BARTHOLOMEW. None whatsoever. Please be careful, Mrs. Lampert. 
Bye. [Regina puts down the phone]. 

DYLE [coming into the room in a white dressing-gown] I left all 
my drip-dry dripping—is that alright? What's the matter, is 
something wrong? [Seeing her expression unchanged] Oh, you're 
probably weak from hunger—you've only eaten five times today. 
I'll get someone to fix up my suit quickly and take you out to 
dinner. 	

REGINA. Let's go somewhere crowded; I feel like a lot of people.  
Nighttime, on a restaurant barge on the Seine. They sit at a 
table, Regina still grim-faced. 

DYLE. Hey, you know this thing is still damp? You haven't spoken 
a word for twenty minutes. 

REGINA. I was thinking about Charles and Scobie and who's going 
to be next—Me? I don't suppose you know who the murderer is, do 
you? 

DYLE. No, not yet. 

REGINA. Whoever's left alive at the end will pretty much have 
sewn up the nomination, don't you think? 

DYLE. What are you trying to say: that I might have killed 
Charles and Scobie? What do I have to do to satisfy you—become 
the next victim? 

REGINA. It's a start anyway. 

DYLE. I can't understand you at all. One minute you're chasing me 
around the shower room and the next minute you're accusing me of 
murder. 

REGINA. Carson Dyle had no brother [she gets up, sitting against 
the table and looking out across the river]. 

DYLE [getting up, leaning on the rail] Oh, I can explain that if 
you'll just listen. 

REGINA. Well, I can't very well leave without a pair of water 
wings, can I? 

DYLE. Alright, get set for the story of my life. 

REGINA. Fiction or non-fiction? 

DYLE. Er— Why don't you shut up? 

REGINA. Well... 

DYLE. Are you going to listen? 

REGINA. Go on. 

DYLE. Alright. Now, when I was a young man my father expected me 
to go into his business—umbrella frames, that's what he made. Oh, 
a sensible business, I suppose, but I didn't have the sense in 
those days to be sensible. 

REGINA. I suppose all this is leading somewhere? 

DYLE. Well, it led me away from umbrella frames, for one thing. 
But that left me without any honest means of support. 

REGINA. What do you mean? 

DYLE. Well, in this highly competitive world, when a man has no 
profession there isn't much choice, so I began looking for people 
who had more money than they needed, including some they barely 
miss. 

REGINA. You mean, you're a thief? 

DYLE. Well, that's not exactly the term I'd have chosen but it 
sort of captures the spirit of the thing [he smiles at her]. 

REGINA. I don't believe it. 

DYLE. I can't really blame you now. 

REGINA. But I do believe it—that's what I don't believe. So it's 
goodbye Alexander Dyle and welcome home Peter Joshua. 

DYLE. Hmm—Sorry, the name's Adam Canfield. 

REGINA [amazed] Adam Canfield??? Wonderful... Do you realise 
you've had three names in the past two days? I don't even know 
who I'm talking to any more. 

ADAM. Well, the man's the same even if the name isn't. 

REGINA. No, he isn't the same: Adam Canfield is a crook and I 
want to know why. 

ADAM. Well, it's simple: I like what I do, I enjoy my work. There 
aren't many men in the world who love their work as much as I do. 
Now, you look around sometime. 

REGINA. Is there a Mrs. Canfield? 

ADAM. Yes, (& REGINA) but we're divorced. Mmmm, that's right, now 
go and eat your dinner. 

REGINA. Oh, I could eat a horse. 

ADAM [sitting down after her] I think that's what you ordered. 

REGINA. Don't you dare be civil with me after leading me on like 
this. 

ADAM. How did I lead you on? 

REGINA [placing food on her plate] Oh, all that marvellous 
rejection—you knew I couldn't resist it. And now it turns out all 
you're interested in is the money. 

ADAM. That's right. 

REGINA [shocked at his honesty] Oh... 

ADAM. What would you like me to say: that a pretty girl with an 
outrageous manner means more to an old pro like me than a quarter 
of a million dollars? 

REGINA. I don't suppose so. 

ADAM. Mmm, it's a toss-up, I can tell you that. 

REGINA. Mmmm. [Realising what he said] What? 

ADAM. Hasn't it occurred to you that I'm having a tough time 
keeping my hands off of you? Oh, you should see your face. 

REGINA. What's the matter with it? 

ADAM. It's lovely. [Regina drops her fork]. Now what's the 
trouble? 

REGINA [smiling] I'm not hungry anymore, isn't it glorious? [The 
barge lights go out suddenly] Adam! 

ADAM. It's alright; come and look. [Someone on the boat turns on 
a spotlight and shines it at various couples kissing on the 
riverbank]. 

REGINA. Here you don't look so bad in this light. 

ADAM. Well, why do you think I brought you here? 

REGINA. I thought maybe you wanted me to see the kind of work the 
competition was turning out. 

ADAM. Oh... Pretty good, huh? 

REGINA. Mmmm. 

ADAM. I taught them everything they do. 

REGINA. Oh, do they do that kind of thing way back in your day? 

ADAM. Sure. How do you think I got here? 

REGINA [she kisses him] Not allowed to kiss back, huh? 

ADAM. Oh no. Doctor said it was bad for my thermostat. [They kiss 
each other]. Well, when you come on, you come on, don't you? 

REGINA. Well, come on.  The barge sails on down the river. 



 In a bedroom. A phone is ringing. The man in bed wakes up—it's 
Gideon. He answers it. 



GIDEON. Yeah. Hmmm? In the lobby? [Putting on his glasses] I—
[seeing the time on the clock] Are you out of your mind or 
something, it's three-thirty in the morning?! You mean it? 
Alright, alright, I'll be right down. Wait a minute. [He gets up, 
taking his nightgown. He goes outside and walks down the hallway, 
putting his nightgown on. The lift comes up to meet him. It goes 
down a floor and the light goes off.] Hey! hey, hey! Turn on the 
lights! [The lift continues on it's way again] Hey, how do you 
stop this thing? [The lift reaches the bottom and Gideon starts 
sneezing repeatedly. Suddenly, he screams]. Aaaaaaaah!  The hotel 
porter, in his chair, wakes and goes over to the lift. He presses 
the button and it comes up to his floor. Gideon's body lies dead 
in it.  Later. Inspector Grandpierre is in Gideon's room. He has 
been inspecting the body which lies covered on the bed. 

GRANDPIERRE [walking towards Dyle and Regina, who are waiting at 
the doorway dressed in their bedclothes] Three of them. All in 
their pyjamas? C'est ridicule. What is it—some new American fad? 
And, ah, your friend who lives here... erm, the one from Texas, 
he has disappeared—hawoomph—into thin air. Where is he? 

ADAM [him and Regina are in their bedclothes] I wish I knew. 

GRANDPIERRE [to Regina] Madame? Tell me, Mr. Dyle: where were you 
at three-thirty a.m.? 

ADAM. In my room. Asleep. 

GRANDPIERRE. And you, Mrs. Lampert? 

ADAM. I was too. 

GRANDPIERRE. In Mr. Dyle's room? 

ADAM. No, in my room. 

GRANDPIERRE. Obviously you're telling the truth, for why would 
you invent such a ridiculous story? And if I were you, I wouldn't 
stay in my pyjamas. Goodnight. [He leaves]. 

ADAM. Well, that wraps it up. Tex has the money. [Taking her arm, 
motioning her to her apartment] You go to bed; I'll let you know 
when I've found him. 

REGINA. You're going to go looking for him now? 

ADAM [walking with her to their rooms] Well, if the police find 
him first they're not going to turn over that quarter of a 
million dollars to us. 

REGINA [standing outside her door] Oh, Adam! 

ADAM [taking off his bedrobe] Do as I tell you: go to bed and 
bolt your door. [They go into their rooms].  Adam's phone is 
ringing. He answers it. 

ADAM. Yeah? 

TEX [speaking from a public phone, somewhere] Now, you listen to 
me, Dyle: Look, I know who's got that money, man, and I want my 
share—seems to be growin' and growin' every day. Well, I ain't 
disappearin' until I get it. 

ADAM. Where are you, Tex? 

TEX. Come on, man; look, my moma didn't raise no stupid children. 
Look, I'll tell you what: you wanna find me, well you just look 
over your shoulder cause from now on I'm gonna be right behind 
you. [He hangs up].  Dyle puts the phone down and goes over and 
knocks on the connecting door to Regina's room. 

ADAM. Open up. [Regina opens the door]. I think I was wrong about 
Tex having the money. 

REGINA. Why? 

ADAM. I just heard from him, he's still hungry. That means 
killing Gideon didn't get it for him. So he's narrowed it down to 
us. You've got it. 

REGINA. But I've looked everywhere—you know I have, I— 

ADAM. Let me have the airlines bag. 

REGINA. In the wardrobe? 

ADAM. Get in. 

REGINA [going to the wardrobe] Lord, you're obstinate. 

ADAM. Charles must have had it with him on the train when Tex 
killed him. [Taking the bag] Thanks. 

REGINA. Everybody and his Aunt Lilian's been through that bag—
including me. 

ADAM [spilling the contents on the bed] Ok, we do it again. 

REGINA. I've been into it at least once a day. Somebody would 
have seen it. 

ADAM. It's there, Reggie. We're looking at it right now. 
Something on that bed is worth a quarter of a million dollars. 

REGINA. But what? 

ADAM. I don't know, I don't know. [Inspecting the items] Four 
passports. Steamship ticket. Anything in there? 

REGINA [giving him the wallet] Nothing. 

ADAM. Wallet. Comb? Give me the fountain pen. What about that 
key? 

REGINA. To the apartment—matches mine exactly. [Hands it to him]. 

ADAM. Oh... [He takes out his glasses to read what's in the 
envelope but Regina takes them off him]. 

REGINA I'll bet you don't really need those. [Trying them on] You 
need them. [She gives them back]. 

ADAM [putting them on; looking at the letter] Well, it still 
doesn't make sense, but it isn't worth a quarter of a million 
dollars either. 

REGINA [looking at the tin] Wait a minute. 

ADAM. What? 

REGINA. The toothpowder... [gives it to him]. 

ADAM [shaking it by his ear] What about it? 

REGINA. Could you recognise heroin just by the taste of it? 

ADAM [opens the bottle, puts a bit on his finger and tastes it] 
Heroin, peppermint-flavoured heroine. 

REGINA. Well, I guess that's it: dead end. 

ADAM. Well, go to bed. You've got to get up and go to work in the 
morning; there's nothing more we can do tonight. [He turns to 
leave with the bag]. 

REGINA. I love you, Adam. 

ADAM [turning back to her] Yes, you told me. 

REGINA. No. The last time I said "I love you, Alex". 

ADAM. Oh. [Remembering] Oh. [He goes into his room]. 



 The next day, at EURESCO. A few people are sat at the front of a 
room, with many others sitting facing them. At the rear of the 
room are several glass-covered booths in one of which are Regina, 
sat with Sylvie.  A man stands up and speaks for a while in 
Spanish and then sits down. 



REGINA [to Sylvie; sat down with a headset held to her ear] Hold 
it; they're recognising Great Britain.  Sylvie says something in 
French in a panic and rushes back to her booth, putting on her 
headset. A man at the front of the main room stands up and 
address the company. 

ENGLISH MAN. Mr. Chairman, fellow delegates, my distinguished 
colleague from Italy: Her Majesty's delegation has listened with 
great patience to the Southern European...  Adam rushes into 
Regina's booth. 

ADAM. Oh, are you on? 

REGINA. No, it's alright. What's wrong, Adam? 

ADAM. Nothing's wrong: I think I found something. I was snooping 
around Tex's room and came across this in the waste basket. I 
stuck it together again. 

REGINA [looking at the piece of paper on the desk] Well, that's 
the receipt Grandpierre gave me for Charles's things. I don't see 
how that's going to help. 

ADAM. No, you're not looking. Last night when we went through the 
airlines bag something was missing: an agenda. That's an 
appointment book, isn't it? It wasn't there. 

REGINA. That's right. I remember Grandpierre looking through it 
but there was nothing in it—at least nothing that the police 
thought was very important. 

ADAM. Can you remember anything in it at all? 

REGINA. He did say something about Charles's last appointment. 

ADAM. With whom? where? 

REGINA. I think it only said where. 

ADAM. Now, now come on, Reggie: think, think! this may be what 
we're looking for! 

REGINA. Adam! that money doesn't belong to us! If we keep it 
we'll be breaking the law! 

ADAM. Nonsense: we didn't steal it; there's no law against 
stealing stolen money. 

REGINA. Of course there is! 

ADAM. There is? 

REGINA. Yes! 

ADAM. When did they pass such a silly law? Now think, Reggie: 
what was in that appointment book? 

REGINA. Oh— it was a place, or a street corner, or something. 
Watch it, I'm on. [She presses a button on the panel in front of 
her]  A French man in the main group stands up to address the 
people.  Regina starts translating, speaking into the microphone, 
behind the soundproof glass. Adam says something in her ear and 
she almost forgets herself, quickly returning to the microphone. 

REGINA. ...of, of the western hemisphere conference... [Adam 
kisses her neck] O- Of the western hemisphere conference held on 
March twenty-second...—no wait! [The people in the main room 
stir, turning round to look at the booth] It was last Thursday, 
five o'clock at Jardin des Champs-Élysées. That's it, Adam: the 
garden! 

ADAM [looking at his watch] Well, it's Thursday today and it's 
almost five o'clock! so come on! [They get up and Adam leans down 
to the microphone] No, it's alright, gentlemen: carry on.  Regina 
and Adam arrive at the garden, near to the Punch and Judy stage, 
which is shut. 

REGINA. Now what? 

ADAM [checking his watch] Five o'clock, Thursday, the gardens; 
must be something around here. 

REGINA. Charles's appointment was last week. 

ADAM [they start walking, looking around] Yes, I know, but this 
is all we've got left. 

REGINA. You're not kidding. Just ten minutes ago I had a job. 

ADAM. But now you've got another job so stop groaning and start 
looking. [Stopping, pointing] I'll take that side; you poke 
around over here.  Adam looks around. Carnival music is playing 
and the place is busy. Regina looks but doesn't see anything 
either. They look around a bit longer but Adam stops, looking at 
something just when Regina arrives to meet him. 

REGINA. It's hopeless; I don't even know what we're looking for! 

ADAM. I don't think Tex does either. 

REGINA. Tex? is he here? 

ADAM. Look [she follows his eyes]. I'm going to see what he's up 
to. You stay here. 

REGINA. Be careful, Adam; he's already killed three men.  Adam 
follows Tex, who mingles with the crowd at a stamp fair, 
searching for something. Suddenly, Tex realises something: he 
looks at the stamps around him in understanding. He runs off, 
pushing into Adam as he goes past who is inconspicuously looking 
at a stall. Adam, perplexed by Tex's sudden reaction looks around 
the fair himself, seeing the stamps, then runs off after Tex. Tex 
steals someone's taxi as Adam arrives. 

ADAM. Wait! wait! Taxi! [Adam steals the taxi from the stranger 
again].  Regina arrives at where Adam was a moment ago, looking 
around in despair. 



Adam runs up the stairs to the hotel room, holding his gun. He 
goes into his room, finding Tex there. 

ADAM [pointing his gun at Tex, who is casually sitting on the 
bed] Alright, where's the letter? 

TEX. The letter, huh? It ain't worth nothin'. 

ADAM. You know what I mean: the envelope with the stamps on it—I 
want it. 

TEX. You greenhorn. Why, you think-skulled, hare-brained, half-
witted greenhorn! And they was both too smart for us. 

ADAM. What are you talking about? 

TEX. Well, first her husband, now her. She batted all o' them big 
eyes at you and you fell for it like a— an egg from a tall 
chicken! You want that envelope: [giving it to him, the stamps 
ripped out] there, you take it; it's all yours. You killed all 
three of 'em for nothin'! You greenhorn! you blocked-headed 
jackass! You ninkompoop!!! 



Regina sees Sylvie sitting down reading a magazine. 

REGINA. Sylvie: what are you doing here? 

SYLVIE [standing up] I'm waiting for Jean-Louis. 

REGINA. Oh. What's he up to? 

SYLVIE. Oh, he was so excited when he got the stamps you gave him 
this morning; he said he'd never seen any like them. 

REGINA. I'm glad. [Looking at the stalls] What's all this? 

SYLVIE. The stamp market. It's there every Thursday afternoon. 
That's where Jean-Louis trades his stamps. 

REGINA. Good Lord! where is he? 

SYLVIE. What's the matter, cherie? 

REGINA. The stamps! They're worth a fortune! 

SYLVIE. What? 

REGINA. A fortune! Come on! [She takes Sylvie's hand and they run 
into the crowd]. 

REGINA. Oh, I don't see him anywhere. 

SYLVIE. We separate; you look over there. 

REGINA. Ok. 

SYLVIE. Jean-Louis! Jean-Louis? 

REGINA [seeing a child at a stall] Jean-Louis! [He turns around 
but it isn't Jean-Louis]. 

SYLVIE. Jean-Louis! [Finding him] Jean-Louis. Reggie! Reggie! 

REGINA [running to them, bending down to him] Jean-Louis, thank 
heaven; do you have the—[Seeing the packet he is carrying] What's 
this? 

JEAN-LOUIS. A man gave me all those for only three. 

REGINA. A man? Oh no, Jean-Louis! Who? Where? 

SYLVIE [to Jean-Louis who is looking around] Vite, mon cheri, 
vite. [Jean-Louis says something, pointing] 

REGINA. Come on! 

SYLVIE [they arrive at a stall which says it belongs to a M. 
Felix, but it has been closed up] Oh, but he's gone. 

REGINA. I don't blame him.  An old man is looking through a 
magnifying glass. There is a knock at the door. 

FELIX. Entrez.  Regina, Sylvie and Jean-Louis enter the small 
office. 

REGINA. Monsieur Felix? 

FELIX. Oui. [They walk to his desk where he sits] I was expecting 
you; I knew you would come. [Presenting the stamps to him] Look 
at them, madame. Have you ever in your entire life seen anything 
so beautiful? 

REGINA. I'm sorry, I don't know anything about stamps. 

FELIX. I know them as one knows his own face though I had never 
seen them. This one: a Swedish four shilling—called the *, 
printed in eighteen fifty-four. 

REGINA. What is it worth? 

FELIX. Oh, the money is unimportant. 

REGINA. I'm afraid it's very important. 

FELIX. Well, in your money, perhaps eighty-five thousand dollars. 

REGINA. May I sit down? 

FELIX. Yes. 

REGINA [sitting down] And the blue one? 

FELIX. Oh, it's called the Hawaiian blue. In eighteen ninety-four 
the owner was murdered by a rival collector who was obsessed to 
own it. 

REGINA. And what is its value today? 

FELIX. Sixty-five thousand. 

REGINA. And the last one? 

FELIX. Ah, the best for last. The * de la collection; the 
masterpiece. It's the most valuable stamp in the world. It's 
called the Gazette Mauldives. It was printed by hand on coloured 
paper and marked with the initials of the printer. Today it has a 
value of a hundred thousand dollars. I'm not a thief, madame. I 
knew there was some mistake. 

REGINA [she gets up] You gave the boy a great many stamps in 
return—are they for sale now? [She hands him the Jean-Louis's 
packet]. 

FELIX. Oh, let me see. Yes: three hundred and fifty European, two 
hundred Asian, a hundred and seventy-five American, a hundred 
African, and twelve Princess Grace commemorative—which comes to 
ten francs. [She hands him the money] And don't forget these. 

REGINA [taking the envelope portion from Felix] Thank you. I'm 
sorry. 

FELIX. Oh no: for a few minutes they were mine; that is enough. 



 Regina runs up the stairs of the hotel. 



REGINA [knocking and listening at Adam's door] Adam? Adam?  She 
goes to her room and the door is open. She goes in and sees Tex 
tied by the feet to the radiator and by the hands to the bed; he 
has a plastic bag over his face, his mouth open in contortion. 
She rushes over but can't do anything for him. She sees Tex's 
hand next to the letters DYLE spelt out on the carpet.  Wide-eyed 
and shocked, not able to take her eyes off the corpse, Regina 
walks back and takes the phone.  The phone rings at Bartholomew's 
home. He is wearing a bedrobe and his face is covered in shaving 
cream. He answers the phone. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Hello. 

REGINA. Mr. Bartholomew? 

BARTHOLOMEW. Yes. 

REGINA [barely suppressing her distress] Tex is dead; smothered. 
And Adam did it. He killed them all! 

BARTHOLOMEW. Are you sure? 

REGINA. Yes, I'm sure. Tex wrote the word 'Dyle' before he died. 
He's the murderer, I tell you! 

BARTHOLOMEW. Now, wait a minute; just minute, Mrs. Lampert. Er, 
you better give that to me again. 

REGINA. It was the stamps on the letter Charles had with him on 
the train. There were there in plain view all the time but no one 
bothered to look at the envelope. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Now, Mrs. Lampert, listen to me: you're not safe so 
long as you have these stamps. Let's see, erm... Do you know the 
Cinegarden at the Palais Royale? 

REGINA. Yes; the colonade? 

BARTHOLOMEW. Yes, by the colonade—as fast as you can get there. 
Hurry, Mrs. Lampert. 

REGINA. I'm leaving right away. Goodbye. [She hangs up, goes out 
of her room and down the stairs]. 

ADAM [shouting; on his way up in the lift] Reggie! The stamps! 
where are they? [The lift reaches the top] Reggie: wait! [The 
lift starts down again]. 

REGINA. Why? so you can kill me too? Tex is dead; he wrote 'Dyle' 
on the carpet. 

ADAM. I'm not Dyle! you know that! 

REGINA. But Tex didn't know it. You're a murderer! 

ADAM [from inside the hotel as Regina runs outside] Reggie: I 
want those stamps! 

REGINA [to a taxi driver parked outside] Palais Royale; vite.  
The driver responds in some French, shaking his head meaning she 
can't have the taxi. She responds in French but he repeats his 
answer.  Regina takes off down the street, Adam running after 
her. Regina goes down the steps into the subway, pushing past 
another person to pay for her ticket. She runs on. Adam follows 
after, hurriedly paying for his.  Regina gives her ticket to the 
ticketman down the next flight of steps. Adam follows, 
overshooting the box in his hurry. 

TICKETMAN [grabbing Adam by the arm, stopping him] Wo-ho!  The 
ticketman says something in French. Adam stops to have his ticket 
processed.  Regina runs down a flight of steps onto the subway 
plaform (St. Jacques). She sees Adam across the tracks on the 
other side. He holds up his hand to indicate her to stop and runs 
back the way he came. Regina waits, looking down the tunnel 
impatiently. The train arrives and she gets on as Adam starts 
down the stairs. Regina crouches on her seat behind the one in 
front. As the train doors close, Adam forces them apart and 
squeezes through onto the train. Regina sighs with relief, not 
seeing him get on. Adam walks through the carriage, looking for 
her, and they spot each other through the glass between her 
carriage and his. He tries to open it but fails. She stays put in 
her seat, waiting for the next station as Adam stands 
impatiently, his eye on her.  The train slows for the next 
station and Regina gets up to leave. The doors open and she gets 
out and runs up the steps. Adam rushes out, looking for her, 
running into some nuns then follows up the steps. At the next 
level he doesn't see any sign of her and runs off down the 
corridor. Regina watches him leave from the phone booth in which 
she is hiding.  She dials a number. A secretary answers. 

SECRETARY. American Embassy. 

REGINA [whispering] American Embassy? Er, Mr. Bartholomew's 
office, please. 

SECRETARY. Would you speak a little louder, please? 

REGINA. I can't speak any louder. Mr. Hamilton Bartholomew. 

SECRETARY. I'm sorry, Mr. Bartholomew has left for the day. 

REGINA [sighs in despair] But someone's trying to kill me. 

SECRETARY. What? 

REGINA [whispering as loudly as she can] Kill me! You've got to 
get to him, right away. He's- he's in the centre garden of the 
Palais Royale, near the colonade. Tell him I'm trapped in a phone 
booth, right below him in the Metro station, and the name's 
Lampert!  Adam has been running down the corridor buts meets a 
dead end. He backtracks to the area with the phone and Regina 
hears him, cowering below the level of the phone booth windows. 
Adam looks around in despair, returning to look down the stairs. 
While his back is turned, Regina creeps out. Adam looks back down 
at the bottom of the stairs for her on the plaform. Regina runs 
to the exit, however the way is barred. 



A phone rings. It is answered by a man we haven't seen before. 

SECRETARY. Hello, Mr. Bartholomew? 

MR. BARTHOLOMEW. Yes. 

SECRETARY. There was a call for you just now, Mr. Bartholomew. It 
sounded quite urgent; a Mrs. Lampert. 

MR. BARTHOLOMEW. Lampert? I don't any Mrs. Lampert. 

SECRETARY. She says she's trapped in a Metro station and 
someone's trying to kill her. 

MR. BARTHOLOMEW. Trying to kill her? Who does she think I am, the 
C.I.A.? Alright, I guess you better call the French police. 



The centre garden of the Palais Royale, lined with pillars. 
Barholomew is waiting there. Meanwhile, back on the plaform, Adam 
continues to look for Regina. Regina peers down the stairs 
towards him and creeps down. As she reaches the bottom, Adam's 
back to her, he suddenly turns around. She runs firther along the 
platform up a different set of stairs, followed again by Adam, 
and then out into the street. Adam follows her across the road to 
the Palais Royale. She sees Bartholomew standing in front by the 
pillars. 

REGINA [running towards him] Mr. Bartholomew! Mr. Bartholomew! 
Help me! 

ADAM. Reggie: [stopping, pulls out his gun] stop! That man is 
Carson Dyle.  Bartholomew looks, frightened, at Adam, and pulls 
his gun, hiding behind a pillar. Regina stops, standing in the 
open betweeen the two of them. 

BARTHOLOMEW. We all know Carson Dyle is dead, Mrs. Lampert. 

ADAM. I tell you, he's Carson Dyle. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Now, you're not going to believe him. Just bring 
those stamps over here; he's trying to trick you again. 

ADAM [Regina reaches into her handbag] Tex recognised him: that's 
why he wrote 'Dyle'. If you take him those stamps, he'll kill you 
too.  Regina stands perplexed, looking from one man to the other, 
each holding his gun. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Mrs. Lampert: if I am who he says I am, what's 
preventing me from killing you right now? 

ADAM. Because he'd have to come out to get the stamps and he 
knows he'll never make. 

BARTHOLOMEW. Mrs. Lampert: he wants the money for himself—that's 
all he's ever wanted. 

REGINA [to Adam] He's with the C.I.A.; I saw him at the Embassy. 

ADAM [emphatically] I tell you, he's Carson Dyle! 

BARTHOLOMEW [sarcastically] That's right, Mrs. Lampert, that's 
right: I'm a dead man—look at me! 

REGINA [she looks between the two men distressed and in total 
confusion] Oh! I don't know who anybody is! 

ADAM. Reggie: I beg you, just trust me once more. 

REGINA [crying out] Why should I?! 

ADAM. I can't think of a reason in the world why you should.  
Regina looks at him for a moment, her expression changing. She 
makes a step towards him. 

CARLSON DYLE. Stop right now, Mrs. Lampert, or I'll kill you!  
Regina freezes. 

ADAM. It won't get you the stamps, Dyle: you'll still have to 
come out to get them and I'm not likely to miss at this range! 

CARLSON DYLE. Maybe not, but it takes a lot of bullets to kill 
me. They left me there with five of them in my legs and my 
stomach. Mrs. Lampert: they knew I was still alive but they left 
me there. I spent ten months in a German prison camp with nothing 
to stop the pain. They left me there, Mrs. Lampert, they deserved 
to die! 

REGINA. But I had nothing to do with it! 

CARLSON DYLE. You've got the money now! It belongs to me! 
[Cautiously, Adam moves away from behind the pillar to the other 
side, towards Dyle] Mrs. Lampert: they knew I was still alive but 
they left me there. That's why I had to kill them—all four of 
them. Please believe me, Mrs. Lampert, I'll kill you to, it won't 
make any difference. [Regina stands terrified] It's no use, 
you're running out of time. I've come too far to turn back. I 
swear I'll kill you! [Adam takes aim at Dyle from behind a 
pillar] Make up your mind, Mrs. Lampert, now! 

REGINA [screaming] Adam!  Adam fires, hitting the pillar. They 
exchange shots as Regina runs away. Dyle follows and Adam fires 
as he runs away, and misses twice. Adam takes off after them. 
Regina finds a door and goes through, followed soon after by Dyle 
who locks the door. Dyle finds himself in a theatre, Regina 
nowhere to be seen. Adam reaches the locked door but has to run 
to find another way in. In the theatre Dyle walks down an aisle 
toward the stage, peering behind the curtain and, on finding the 
lighting box, turns on the stage lights. Adam finds a way in, 
entering the theatre in a backstage area.  Dyle walks across the 
stage, watched by a terrified Regina from the prompter's box. Not 
seeing her, Dyle searches around the side of the stage as Adam 
walks down the steps to a large room below the stage. He hears 
the floorboards creak far above as Dyle walks around stage area. 
Knowing where Dyle is, he runs back up the stairs to another 
door, but finds it locked. Regina peers across the stage and 
ducks down when she hears the noise of Adam trying the door. Her 
movement catches the eye of Dyle, searching at the back of the 
stage. 

CARLSON DYLE. Alright: I know you're in there, Mrs. Lampert; come 
on out. [He starts towards her. Underneath the stage, Adam see a 
rack of levers corresponding to the marks on the ceiling marking 
out portions of the stage and rushes back down the stairs to 
them]. Do you hear me? Come on out! [Adam arrives at where the 
levers are]. I don't want to kill you, but I will. [Adam studies 
the markings on the ceiling and then the levers. Dyle walks 
closer to Regina] Come on out! [Adam puts his hand on a lever, 
looks back at the ceiling, listening to Dyle's footsteps then 
looks back at the levers, moving his hand to another one. Dyle 
stops, his gun trained on where Regina is hiding, terrified] Game 
is over, Mrs. Lampert. [Adam fingers the lever, looking up at 
where Dyle is. With a quick pull on the lever the section of the 
stage where Dyle is standing opens and he falls straight through] 
Nooooooooooooo......! [He hits the ground hard, dead].  Regina 
peers up in relief and Adam walks over to inspect the body. 



Adam and Regina are sitting on the back seat of a taxi driving 
through Paris. Adam massages her feet. 

REGINA [tired] You didn't have to chase me so hard. That one's 
done, do this one. 

ADAM. Oh [takes her other foot]. 

REGINA. I'm sorry I thought you were the murderer. But how was I 
to know he was as big a liar as you are? 

ADAM. Is that all the gratitude I get for saving your hide? 
[Putting her foot down, annoyed] Here, rub your own big * foot. 

REGINA. The truth now: was it my hide or those stamps? 

ADAM. Well, what a terrible thing to say; how could you think 
that? 

REGINA. Then prove it to me. Tell me to go to the Embassy first 
thing in the morning and turn in those stamps. [She gets no 
reaction] I said, tell me to go to the Embassy first thing in 
the—. 

ADAM. I heard you, I heard you, I heard you, I heard you. 

REGINA. Then say it. 

ADAM. Now, Reggie: listen to me, there's something I'd like to 
explain—. 

REGINA. Never mind; I'll go by myself. 

ADAM. Well, what makes you think they're even interested? It's 
only a quarter of a million dollars; it'll cost more than that 
for them to fix up their book-keeping. Now, as a taxpayer—. 



 The next day. Adam and Regina are walking to the Embassy. 



REGINA. Who's a taxpayer?—crooks don't pay taxes! [To a man on 
guard duty] Excuse me, soldier. 

MARINE. Marine, ma'am. 

REGINA. Oh, forgive me. Who would I see regarding the return of 
stolen government money? 

MARINE. Well, you might try the treasury department, ma'am: room 
two-seventeen, second floor; Mr. Crookshank. 

REGINA. Two seventeen—thank you, Marine.  In the Embassy. They 
get out of the lift. Adam stops her on the way to the door. 

ADAM. Er, er, do you mind if I don't go in with you? The sight of 
all that money being given away might make me break out.  She 
shakes her head at him and goes in. 

REGINA [addressing the secretary] Mr. Crookshank, please; my name 
is Lampert. 

CROOKSHANK'S SECRETARY. Yes. [Taking the phone] Mr. Crookshank? A 
Miss—. 

REGINA. Mrs. 

CROOKSHANK'S SECRETARY. Mrs. Lampert to see you. Yes sir. 
[Putting the phone down] Go right in. 

REGINA. Thank you. [Regina goes through the door into the office. 
Her expression turns to surprise when she sees Adam sitting at 
the desk. He pulls his face at her playfully. She walks to his 
desk] Of all the mean, rotten, contemptible, crooked—! 

ADAM [offended] Crooked? I should think you'd be glad to find out 
I'm not crooked. 

REGINA. You can't even be honest about being dishonest! Why 
didn't you say something? 

ADAM. We're not allowed to tell. Now, come on, give me the 
stamps. 

REGINA. Mmm [goes to take the stamps out and stops] Wait a 
minute: How did Carson Dyle get an office in this building 
anyway? 

ADAM. Oh, when did you meet him?—what time of day, I mean? 

REGINA. About one. 

ADAM. Hmm, the lunch hour. Probably worked it out in advance: 
found an office usually left open and just moved in for the time 
you were here. 

REGINA. Then how do I know this is your office? 

ADAM. Mrs Foster: take a memo to Bartholomew in security 
recommending that—. 

REGINA [realising] Bartholomew... 

ADAM. —Recommending that Embassy offices be kept locked during 
the lunch hour. 

REGINA [sitting down] Mmm, starting with his own. 

ADAM [he gets up, walking to her] Mmm-mmm. Now give me the 
stamps; come on. 

REGINA. And what's your first name, today? 

ADAM. Brian. 

REGINA [as he sits on the desk] Brian Crookshank. Serves me right 
if I get stuck with that one. 

BRIAN. Well, who asked you to get stuck with any of them? 
[Reaching for her handbag] Come on... 

REGINA. Is there a Mrs. Crookshank? 

BRIAN. Yes. 

REGINA. —But we're divorced. 	

BRIAN. No. 

REGINA. Oh. 

BRIAN [he takes out his wallet, taking out a photo to show her] 
My mother. She lives in Detroit. You'd like her—she'd like you 
too. Come on, give me those stamps. 

REGINA [crossing her arms] Not until you prove to me that you're 
really Brian Crookshank. 

BRIAN. Alright, one day next week I'll put it on the marriage 
license; how about that, if you—. 

REGINA. Quit stalling: I want some identification now. 

BRIAN. I wouldn't lie on a license—. 

REGINA. You can't prove it to me, can you? you're still trying 
to—. [Her expression turns to joy] Marriage license! Did you say 
marriage license? 

BRIAN [as Regina gets up] Now, don't change the subject, just 
give me the stamps. 

REGINA [putting her arms around his neck] Oh, I love you Adam, 
Alex, Peter, Brian—whatever your name is. Oh, I love you. I hope 
we have a lot of boys and we can name them all after you. 

BRIAN. Well, alright, but before we start that, may I have the 
stamps?  She kisses him and they embrace.